I know I shouldn't be feeling like this! Confused!!!?

[Heavyrain]

So I've been best friends with my former ex for 8+ years, we talk on and over for the year since he joined the army and over seas he's been calling and writing me every chance he could get. I was hiding the fact I had a boyfriend to try and fill a void which my current bf isn't all that. Nothing compare to my best friend. And he was hiding he had a gf until he told me few months later. And I did as well. He broke up with his gf few weeks before he came back to USA to work things knowing I have a bf who doesn't treat me right. Well he's station 6 states away and I admit I had mix feelings and can't work anything out till he's here. Anyway! We aren't fb friends but still talk through it ik it's weird.. I just found out last night -he's in a relationship as of a week ago and I'm not sure how serious they are but it's all I love you such and such on her wall god I'm one those people LOL I had to know!! Because he keeps saying he wants to marry me and helps me with rent because he doesn't want me to be in a relationship with my bf now since I live with him n his fam.


So my question is .. Like why is he hiding he has a gf? And telling me this? And he's legit serious about it and is going to fly here soon... I honestly am thinking bringing this up but I feel like I shouldn't since I mean I am in a relationship but not committed I'm miserable !! Does my ex want to get back with me if I break up with my bf but has a gf till then?

[Jenny]

It's only complicated because the two of you are making it that way. Either he wants to be with you or he doesn't. Either you want to be with him or you don't. If your mind is all wrapped up with him, then it's not fair to your current bf and you're wasting his time... let him go and THEN deal with your feelings for this other guy. If he doesn't want to drop his hidden gf for you, then yes, you might then be heart broken AND alone, but it doesn't hurt forever and you have to remind yourself that you're worth having someone to love that loves you back the same way, someone that doesn't play games. It's not what you want to hear, but just tell yourself to drop the drama, do some house cleaning, deal with the consequences and move on with your life, whether that means he's in it with you or not. Ripping the bandaid off is always painful, but in the end you'll be glad you did it and didn't waste precious time because life's too short to waste on people that don't deserve to be in your life. And never, ever be afraid to be alone for a while until what you need comes along. A lot of women are afraid of being a little lonely but the times when you are makes you appreciate it when you're not, and right now you're suffering in some kind of horrible self-imposed limbo. Trust me, just deal with it one step at a time and once the dust settles you'll know you did the right thing.