Am I doomed?

[Cerebral Cortex]

I'm beginning to grow bitter and emotionless. I have a bad stutter that has ruined my life. Speaking feels like forcing words through the esophagus while being strangled. I get very frustrated because I cannot express myself verbally. When ever there is any emotion involved (anger, happiness, excitement) I literally seize silent with my mouth open. Speech therapy was too childish and useless. I have no friends. I have never shared intimacy with anybody nor had a girlfriend. I crave relationships and human interaction but have grown to understand that i'm not fit for them. I absolutely hate being a burden for others. I finished a b.s. in physics and do not consider myself to be a complete idiot, yet when I speak I come across as a deluded nutcase. I work a min. wage job and still live with my parents. I spend lots of time online in chat rooms which I've learned to despise. On the weekends I buy myself three cases of beer and drink them during the evenings while playing depressing classics, reading depressing and philosophical lit, and trolling chat rooms. On occasion I play more cheerful music and watch TV. I like to maintain a fit physique and hygiene, dress nice, and do not consider myself unattractive. This fact kills me as I cannot get a girl to release my immense sexual tension that has built up since puberty. I am also picky with girls and care as much about her looks as her character. Most of the time i find myself meta-cognizant of everything and find it very hard to enjoy anything. Life just seems like one giant mechanization of cause and effect. Everything is marketing and business and there is nothing genuine and true. I dreamed of becoming a surgeon since childhood but after completing college have realized the prospect to be unrealistic. My mood swings from melancholy to stoic to hatred. Everything around me is becoming less colorful by the day. Even if I was somehow cured of the speech impediment, I'm not sure i would be able to carry out a conversation. I have nothing to say. Sometimes I imagine that I'm blowing this entire situation out of proportion, like everything's in my head, but upon a chance at conversation I return to my standard mindset. I am very nervous about my future. Often times I have a strong urge to release myself from my body.

[Kristine A]

See a counselor sweetie.

[Professor]

Unfortunately you have to overcome an affliction that is devastating but please do not give up hope, IT CAN BE BEATEN ! I realise that it is very easy for me to say, however if I may proffer a small piece of advice to assist, please try to obtain a copy of the film, "The Kings Speech"
Briefly I will attempt to give you the gist of the plot, George, one of the heirs to the British crown stuttered almost uncontrolably, however because he was subsorbinate to his brother Edward in the line of reign this stutter was never addressed. Unfortunately, virtually on the threshold of World War ii Edward decided to abdicate his inheritance and elope with American divorcee Mrs. Simpson, this move handed the Crown of the British Isles to his brother George,the stutterer. Panic then ensued as the British Parliament had given the vote to declare war on the Third Reich of Germany and this declaration had to be mede to the British populace and in doing so it was feared that the Kings stutter may sound, over the airwaves, that the King was afraid. The movie, based on fact and reality, was how the King was taught the technique of overcoming this stutter in order to make all of the wartime speeches to the populace of the world in a clear confident and certain manner. Please do not lose heart, IT CAN BE DONE, and I personally feel extremely confident that you will be just the one to prove this.

[Cooper]

When I try not to stutter, I stutter more. Thinking about what I am saying rather than how I am saying it helps. I stutter more when I am tired, so I try to get plenty of rest. When I talk, I keep it slow pausing often and sometimes think of a metronome to pace my speech. Sliding into some words helps. I learned all this from the books and videos from the Stuttering foundation. You can meet others who stutter and get encouragement from them through several Facebook groups. Your doctor could prescribe an anti-anxity medication or refer you to a good psychologist who might help with other issues.

[Callie]

I feel you. I also stutter. There's a thing in Norfolk Virginia, where they can help cure stutters. It didn't work for me but it works for most people. You should also try seeing a therapist.