A guy I don't really know (met online) wants to get drunk together - clueless or creepy?

[Amalie]

I started talking to this guy on an online dating site, and he's pretty cool. We've had some good conversations, and we added each other on Facebook. Looking through all of it, he seems legit and not like a fish or sleazebag. We haven't met yet though, although we've talked about getting lunch a few times. But then last night, he messaged me on Facebook and after some small talk, asked if I ever drink, and then asked "Wanna get drunk together?" Thinking he was joking, I sarcastically said "sure why not," and apparently the sarcasm was lost on him because he asked when I would want to do this. He was being kind of pushy and not acting like he usually does, so I'm suspecting he himself was drunk when he was sending these messages.

I'm 29, so I'm not a kid (he's a couple of years younger). And I know it would be the dumbest thing ever to go out and get wasted with a guy I don't even know. I think the first time meeting someone from a dating site should be at a place like a coffee shop or restaurant, and it shouldn't involve getting drunk.

Is it at all possible that he's just clueless and genuinely just thinks it would be fun to get wasted together? His dating profile did indicate that he isn't into casual sex (neither am I) - but this seems suspicious. Is he just a sleaze and hoping to get some sex? I really like talking to him, so I would hate to have to cut him loose - but obviously, if he is just a sleaze, I don't really want anything to do with him anyway.

[238]

I would personally go for it if I liked the guy, but at the same time I would understand the risks involved and accept that something bad might also happen to me. If I really liked a guy I would probably sleep with him, even if he didn't want a serious relationship. It's better than nothing, I guess,

It depends on what you want to do and your personal standards. You don't owe him anything and vice verse.

[Granny Tea]

A guy who asks for your first time of meeting each other to be for the purpose of getting drunk together IS NOT looking for a long term relationship with you. Your instincts are right. You should listen to them.

No matter how legit he seemed in the past, he just made his true intentions known.

[Ebook]

both

[Kittysue]

He's trying to get you drunk to have sex with you. If he liked you, he would invite you for coffee, not to get drunk

[Bianca]

I disagree with all these other answers. Yes, at face value, a guy who wants to get drunk with you is trying to get in your pants. But you say before, he wanted to get lunch with you, not get drunk. And he really could just be that clueless that he doesn't get how he's coming off. There are exceptions to every rule.

Honestly, if he was drunk when he was sending you those messages (which he very well could have been if he was really that different from usual), you should really take everything he said with a grain of salt. It may have been something completely innocent like he was wasted and lonely and wished you were there, not to bang you but to hang out with you, so he wanted to get wasted with you next time.

Tell him (when he's sober) that you're not comfortable getting drunk with a guy you don't know. If he gets it and still wants to have lunch with you, go ahead. If he takes it all personally and acts like a jerk, drop it like it's hot.