I Need Help?

[688]

I am finally at this point. I always told myself that I would never even consider this. But here I am. I am contemplating suicide. I hate to say it. It has just become too much. And please don't tell me "it gets better" or any of that crap because I have been depressed for like three years. There is too much pressure. I am pressured to do really well in school. I am not allowed to do what I want when it comes to school. I have no say in anything.

I am that guy who everyone thinks doesn't have a care in the world. I am the guy who is always happy and tries to make people laugh. But inside, I am seriously hurting. Tonight especially as was misled by a girl and a couple friends about the girl. I am taking her to prom, but I had thought she "liked" me. Turns out we are just going to go as friends.

Also, I am always the guy who allows the other person to go first or make the decision or do what they want. Nobody ever puts me first. I only have one friend who really ever puts me first. Because I'm the oldest and the only guy out of the kids, I'm also never even thought of when it comes to being put first in my family.

Nobody cares about my opinion and no girl cares about me that I care about.

Thank you for your time.

Again I hate it has come to this, but I really just do not feel happy at all anymore and it is becoming more and more difficult to be "happy".

[Nicki]

It hurts me when someone has a problem like this. I never know what to say except for there has to be someone who cares about you. Maybe you have depression. It would be a good idea to talk to someone about your problem. I mean, you could even tell the friend if you're close enough to her.

[greenfrogs]

Okay you are going to the prom so you have to be jr or sr, right. College I so different than HS it is hard to believe and it is the best time you will have. Wait for it. in the meantime see a dr for some pills if need be.

[Temi]

I had thought of the same thing at one point in my life. What I did was I drove somewhere else and stayed away from my problems for about a week to see my world from afar. I thank God I did because I was able to see cleary how wonderful life is, that though other people have hurt me a lot, there are still thousands of reasons for me to keep on going. I started to focus on helping other people and realized that my problems are too small compared to them, that what I am going through cannot be compared to what others are going through. Maybe you just need time and space for yourself, get away from your world and try to see it from afar. I am definite that you will find more reasons to keep going.

[Patricia]

Hi.. i would suggest you check out this website.. there is a lot of good information and also information for help http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

I have noticed most people (not just kids) have some idea their personal contentment is going to come from other people. Well, it's just not true! Our contentment comes from inside, and until we practice self love, self compassion, we aren't going to get very far at all. Lots of information about both of these topics on the internet, and there is nothing wrong with self improvement. When we get content INSIDE we project it on the OUTSIDE. If you practice what you learn about loving yourself, self-compassion daily, you will notice an improvement in a very short amount of time. I also suggest a search on gratitude.

I didn't understand what you meant when you said you're not allowed to do what you want when it comes to school?

About the girl who you said "misled" you.... you have a date for the prom, with someone who thinks enough of you to want to accompany you. Why not look forward to having a nice time and to making a good memory? You never know, the two of you might become closer, or you might just make a new friend or two while you're there. There is nothing wrong with going as friends. And believe me, with my life experience, i can tell you, it's often much more important to have a good friend than it is to have a girlfriend or boyfriend.

If you are struggling emotionally, have you considered talking with a therapist? A therapist is there to help you develop some life coping skills. It takes work and effort to make positive changes. Everything on earth takes work. A therapist isn't there to judge you, either... he or she is there to help you find your own direction in life... and how to think and react to situations in a more rational manner. It's very simple, but people make it complex. It's not. No one said it's easy working toward changes, but are you worth it. YES YOU ARE. AND YOU CAN DO IT!

Hon, you are going to meet someone one of these days who shares mutual chemistry and appeal with you. You might meet more than one girl you feel this way about. This mutual appeal doesn't happen every day, and i'm here to tell you i see people getting together as couples who aren't even that interested in each other. They have little in common, don't know how to treat each other decently, but are in a relationship just to be in one. Then they complain about it! So.... sometimes it's not "all that" to be in a relationship... it has to be with someone you have a special, mutual connection with.

I am over 50 years old. I have struggled with depression and was even on medication - which i found was somewhat effective, but not as effective as self-improvement and working to make positive changes in my thinking.

We DO radiate a different vibe toward others when we are content with ourselves.

I think it's time you have a serious conversation with your parents about your struggle. If you need help doing it? Make an appointment with your school counselor or a teacher you trust and respect, and ask them to help you talk with your parents about getting some positive, effective help with your issues.

I'd also like to say i've been single for almost sixteen years. I date, had a boyfriend for about 2 years in all this time, but nothing that serious. I also work on self-compassion and i find things to be grateful for every day. I make my own happiness. I am content being me and with what i do. I focus on my art and photography.... i have a couple of decent friends i get together with from time to time. I moved to California eight years ago, and people here aren't that into making new friends. Where i come from? I had hoards of very nice neighbors and friends. It was lonely and difficult here at first, but i have learned to cope and have found a lot of happiness and contentment just being me!

Take care of YOU... go to that website too.. maybe there is something for help? I hope you'll do your internet research on self-improvement too. You deserve to be kind to yourself. And you are the most important person in your life - remember that.