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What do you think, was I supposed to keep it to myself, am I really a freak, please answer I need your help?
06-24-2014, 09:16 PM
Post: #1
What do you think, was I supposed to keep it to myself, am I really a freak, please answer I need your help?
I fell inlove with my bestfriend(we were bestfriends for 9 years), but I couldn't tell her, i was scared, scared that she never talks to me again, scared that she hates me, we were friends i didn't want to ruin that, i always knew she never felt the same way. Eventually i told her my feelings 4 years ago(she was also leaving school next year), but ever since i told her, she never talked to me, i never saw her or heard her voice. Every time i try to talk to her or say sorry, she completely ignores me, i tried texting her but she still doesn't reply, she sees it but she doesn't reply, she even blocked me on FB when i apologized for not telling her how i felt before. I spent 9 years of my life trying to make her as happy as possible, she meant everything to me, and now shes gone and she wont even talk to me, i feel like im nobody to her, i feel that im worthless, idk what to do, i have been trying to move on for the last 3 years but no use, every time i do, i dream about her, i feel like my heart is getting ripped off my chest, it hurts so much, im still really inlove with her(she is my first love) and i keep missing her more and more everyday, i even talked to her friends to see if shes ok but whenever they talk to her about this she ignores them too, some people said that i was a freak and should have just kept this to myself.

So what do you think, does she hate me? am i really a freak? was i really supposed to keep it to myself? if i did i wouldn't have lost my bestfriend
I really don't know what to do anymore, every time I even think about her I feel like crying, I have no one to go to, no one understands how I feel, sometimes I just wish I was dead just to end this pain, I feel worthless, just posting this question made my eyes tear, please help me, I can't get over her, what am I supposed to do

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06-24-2014, 09:29 PM
Post: #2
 
I know it's hard for you, but First you are not a freak. And whoever says that is an hearthless bastard. Who can love is never a freak. No you shouln't kept it to yourself. Shes the freak for ignoring your love, shes the freak for making you feel like that, shes not worth you. It is not your fault, you got to understand that.
Don't be so hard on yourself. Life moves on, and so should you. And Perhaps you would meet another woman, who is alot prettier, smarter, cutier, and most importantly a woman who will love you.
What could help you is to join some kind of group to keep yourself occupied. New connections will be good for you. Find some friends. New friends replaces old friends. Trust me.

I hope i helped. Because english is not my first language.

Everything will be okay.

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