Is it right for parents to read texts?

[Hdiva18]

I will be 18 this Saturday. I believe I have proved time and time again to my parents that I am responsible. I'm trying to get another/second job, I try to pay my car payments and gas, I buy my own make-up, pay for my hair appointments, and some of clothes. My Mom confiscated my phone last night and went through and read my text messages. I have given her reason's not to trust to me, yet she wonders why I don't want to talk to her about things because of my Mom reacts, she blows everything out of proportion. There are certain things that I talk about to my friends, about a boy that I like. She made judgments and assumptions about him through things I said when I was angry at him. She has not given it back, yet she has access to my Facebook(Which I'm pretty sure she investigated him already on Facebook) and email. But lately she needs to know everything about me. She even installed a tracker on my phone.

I'm a honor student who is heavily involved in school, I have a job. I never have drank, smoked, did drugs, or had sex or even a boyfriend. I just have a hard time coming to her in fear of judgment and further accusations. Was it right for her to do what she did? I didn't have anything else wrong on my phone but saying this constant leash I have been tied to for 18 years is going to make me go buck wild when I'm in college. I feel she completely invaded my privacy, just because I don't like talking to her about boys. It makes me uncomfortable.
This all stemmed from me asking to go to a party the night of Homecoming. I have never been invited to a high school party before and all of my friends were there. I ASKED first, I do admit I trying to find a way to get there one way or another. But I still asked first. I felt left out. Sometimes I feel like my mother is dissappointed in me. That I'm not the popular, pom-pom that she was in high school. I won't be graduating third in the class like she did, but 77th out of 568. She never tells me she is proud of me anymore, it just seems like my Dad that is my only encourager. She used to get excited whenever I had a job interview, now it seems like nothing to her. I feel if I did go out with this boy, that she would not approve of the relationship. Which sucks, because it seems like lately he is interested too.

[Lost paradise]

yeah tell her you need space and she needs to trust you more

[USMarine]

They're your parents. They're always going to annoying and nosy. But that was still pretty messed up. You should start deleting all your texts so she has nothing to incriminate you with.

[Chloe]

I think it was wrong of her to go about it like that, but in my opinion I think what she's scared of is you growing up. You're stating all of your responsibilities and I don't think that's what she wants. She stil sees you as a little girl and she doesn't want you to grow up.

[Caroline]

Your mum is extremely nosey! That's not right at all especially because you're nearly an adult! My mum reads my messages and stalks my Facebook page and its so annoying. It makes me never want to talk about things with my friends unless it is in person. Your parents seem like that overly strict type who never let's you go anywhere or see anyone. I suggest you tell her it makes you uncomfortable or that you don't like it and show her that you really want her to stop.

[Lisa Anderson]

Am I right thinking you are based in the US? Your Mum cares about you & reading your texts is normal for fear of association with the 'odd-balls' who could hurt you. The tracking device is a great idea as anything can happen & while seemingly over protective, what I read and view on TV here in the UK about abductions/rape/murders in the US I would opt for this caution if I had a daughter.
Right now you feel 'invaded', but later on you will thank them and remember, you will excercise same caution with your children later on. As to your texts: just make sure there is nothing offensive on screen keeping private stuff for 'phone conversations/letters.
Your Mum is proud of you but perhaps not displaying approval in the way you want. Yes, it can be frustrating now re the stuff you're going through but in time you will appreciate the care - yes, CARE for that is why she is checking your texts & tracking you. Would you rather no-one cared & lived with a family who totally ignored your every move drank, participated in drugs & allowed you to come & go as you please? No, thought not. Try to sit with your Mum and have a chat - good luck.

[Londron Oroso]

You're an adult.

Start acting like one.

Tell your mom to mind her own business.

If there's a tracker in your phone I would show her to phone and place your foot on it.

Change the password of your facebook.

etc. etc.

I'm amazed you tolerate that stuff.

About the boyfriend issue.

My sister at age 15 had her first real boyfriend. My father is a pretty big racist. Her first boyfriend was from Iran(lives here in Belgium obviously).

My 15 year old sister basically told my father to fuck off.

At 15.

Grow some hair on your teeth as they say.

[Jenny]

After you graduate from high school, you'll need to cut the cord. Your mother is going to need more time to come to terms with the fact that you are an adult than you will have patience for. Once you graduate from high school, get your own phone, either prepaid or contract. Most importantly, pay for your own college. Refuse for your parents to pay your tuition. As long as you take money from them, as long as you let them provide you with food and shelter, your mother will feel that she is entitled to check on you.

[lala]

It's on,y right for a pare t to read their child's texts if they give them a reason not to trust them.

[ThtRandomPersonâ„¢]

At 18, I wouldnt have allowed my parents to come close to reading my texts or anything like that. Keep your phone hidden and tell them your not a child.