My gay boyfriend cheated on me with a girl.?

[Purple]

Me and my boyfriend James have been dating for the past 3 months. We met at a LGBT youth group. I needed some guidance so i attendant a meeting, and there he was, James. We bonded over the fact that we go to the same school and blah blah blah, that same day i went over to his house, and no one was home and before i knew it we were making out. Anyways day’s later we made our relationship official, but one big giant secret cause we’re still in the closet.

James and I are totally different, he’s a jock, i'm a theatre geek. He goes to parties on the weekends, i stay at home and watch re-runs of Glee.

The thing is, James totally ignores me at school. A lot of people assume i’m gay, because I’m kinda flamboyant -- and being in musical theatre doesn’t help my image..so James being seen with me could ruin his rep. It kind of hurts my feelings..but i understand, i guess.

Anyways, yesterday i was hanging out with my two best girl friends and one of them started talking about how she walked in on James and this girl Ashley having sex at a party yesterday. My friends didn’t know me and James we’re going out. When i heard that i wanted to just burst in to tears. I know James isn’t bi. Trust me, i know -- he's gone on about how he finds women's body parts revolting. He totally did it, so people wouldn’t question his sexuality. He clearly doesn’t care about my feelings. I haven’t talked to him about the situation. I don’t know what to do, or how to go about it.

And the sad thing is, there’s pictures of them making out all over Facebook. It kills me. Cause i really fell for him, he was my first bf, the first guy i had sex with -- He's charming, good looking, smart, but it kills me that he's so ashamed of who he is.

What would you do? Would you break up with him? Any advice you could give me on how to hand the situation?

[Arthur]

Well I would say both of you come out of the closet and your not sure if it was your James also he needs to apologize if he did even if he was just trying to prove he's straight

[GQ]

You honestly need to talk with him. And you shouldn't be his dirty little secret. Basically you both need to come out and he decide if he wants to keep trying to live a lie or if he really cares for you.

[Xanney]

I'm sorry this has happened to you, I don't think James is the right person for you. He's not ready to be in the committed relationship you are looking for, move on.

[Lou]

Sorry to hear that happened to you ,especially because you haven't come out yet
and can't truly express your pain to someone close to you, But you really should try
to move on and forget him, your better than that and deserve someone who won't disrespect you
like that!
he obviously wants to keep his secret hidden , why I don't know? especially in this day and age it's nothing to be ashamed of, caring about someone who is the same sex doesn't define who you
are as a person and it's no ones business who you sleep with.
any way you deserve better, so try to move on, it will be hard cause it seems you you really cared
for him, but there is other fish in the sea, and you will find someone who will treat you the way
you need and deserve to be treated,

Good Luck
hope it all works out for ya

[techo_pop_gal]

It seems to me that he cares more about the opinions of narrow-minded homophobes than his own boyfriend. You deserve a lot better than that and you should let him know that. If he bluntly refuses to stop hurting you in such a way, it's time to break up with him and find someone who really loves you. I know it probably sucks to be told this, but the harsh reality of the situation is that you simply deserve someone who treats you right, and it isn't him.