I really fell for someone should I go after them?

[D-vine]

Out of my 4 classes I've taken for my motorcycle license I've had 2 which were on two separate weeks with Mr. K (one of my instructors). The first class I knew he was flirting with me here and there, but I figured he probably did that with all of the other girls. Well there was only one other girl in my class, and he didn't give her the same attention. I didn't really care though, I was trying to focus on my license, so I walked away thinking he's a good instructor, he's nice, and made me blush.

I had another class the next week. He was full on flirt mode, and I couldn't ignore it this time at all. He made little physical contacts when ever he could and complimented me heavily. While in exercise explanations with all the other students, even if I were in the back of the group he'd notice the small things I was doing. For example I sighed inaudibly and no one noticed, except him! The other time I was rolling a paper back and forth in my hands while listening and he asked me in front of everyone if I was rolling a joint. My point being he always had eyes on me even when we weren't riding.

I had to pull aside during the course bx I wasn't feeling well at one point. My heart was slamming hard from the anxiety, so I was measuring my heart rate on my wrist. I saw him walking towards me and my pulse skyrocketed. He said he wanted to sit with me, which he really didn't have to. We sat out for 20 mins approx while the other instructor watched the group. During this time he complimented me heavily. Noticing the smallest details, while being kind and sincere. We had a great connection, talking about a variety of things. He told me at least twice, 'You're fiesty/fire-y I like that'. So I stayed back while everyone left at the end of the class, so that maybe I could talk to him a little more. He told me it was a good session, to come back next yr with my bike to say hi, and not to be a stranger. The same line he had told a few other students. Half of me was screaming just to drop my digits in his direction, but his farewell threw me off. I left home and didn't think too much of it.

The second I got home, I could NOT get him out of my head. I hadn't felt like that in maybe ten years, that crazy feeling you get when you really like someone. I couldn't stop raving about him to whoever. I replayed everything in my head twice. As I tried to sleep and all I could think about was him, and things I could have said to actually keep contact. I know where he works other than the driving school, I know his name, so I'm sure I could dig him up on facebook. He can't be that much older than I am, maybe 5 yrs? I think he's single? I know that I don't want to wait another year to see him, but I'm not sure if I should go after him. And if I would, how would I go around doing that? I'm really confused and would appreciate serious answers a lot.

[massiveBastard594]

To be honest, it sounds like this guy is a massive player. You might think that he's a nice guy just because he notices small things about you, but let me tell you this: One of the key signs of an experienced player is attentiveness.

I just don't get a good vibe about this guy at all, from what you've written. In my opinion, he sounds like he's coming on way too fast. The comment he says about "You're fiery, I like that" makes me feel a little queasy in the stomach...there's just something not right about it. It seems a little sleazy and way too flirtatious.

Yes, it's normal that you are feeling this way, but honestly I think you can do better. He's obviously very confident in himself (if he wasn't, he wouldn't have approached you). Also, consider this. Obviously he doesn't know you very well. He doesn't know you the way your best friend would know you. So basically, the only thing he knows about you is that you're an attractive, funny, nice girl. Let me tell you now: There are millions of pretty, funny, nice girls in this world. Millions. So why is he flirting with you when he doesn't even know you? What's to stop him from flirting with other funny, pretty, nice girls? Absolutely nothing. In fact, it's my guess that he would flirt with them whenever he gets the chance (and chances are you won't see him flirt with them, because he will be careful not to let you see it).

Bottom line: You sound like a nice person. But your feelings are just typical giddiness. You're flattered at his attention. And what girl wouldn't be? It's natural you feel this way. But if I were you, I'd be very wary of this guy. In my experience, I've found that if any guy approaches me after only just meeting me, and he starts to flirt, it tends to mean he does it to any pretty girl. Meanwhile, if you meet a guy and he's shy and quiet around you, and then you gradually build up a friendship, and then over time he starts opening up and starts showing signs of interest, then it's safe to say that he likes you for you-because he knows your personality. In my opinion, you should find a guy like that. The guy you mentioned in your question sounds like very bad news.

EDIT: One more thing. Please do not kid yourself by saying "I fell for this guy". If by "fell" you mean "fell in love", then you're very wrong. You do not love the guy. Real love takes years to grow. It is built upon a solid foundation, not a few conversations and a bit of flirting. I just hope you don't think that he's in love with you...trust me, nothing could be further from the truth. It sounds harsh, but hopefully I'm saving you from heartbreak.