where do I begin to figure out "who I am"?

[Matilda]

I'm jealous of people with social lives. I have quite a few friends on Facebook, but I don't talk to any of them. I constantly see pictures of them with their groups of friends hanging out and doing fun stuff, you know having a regular teenagers' life, and I get so jealous. I'm 17 and I've literally never had a social life. I pretty much have no friends. The "friends" I do have constantly belittle me and make me feel bad about myself, and when I'm around them I tend to act differently, like I'm not myself. I suffer from anxiety, which makes it hard for me to even try to conjure up a social life. How can I distance myself from my "friends" without being rude about it? I just need time to figure out who the hell I am before I try to make friends with anyone else. I currently see a therapist/psychologist (I'm not really sure what she is) but my GP reffered me to this person who I see every fortnight. I'm not entirely sure that seeing her is even doing anything for me, or maybe I'm just not trying hard enough. But yeah, I have no idea who I am. Most of my life I've tried so hard to please everybody even if they treat me like crap I will just laugh it off and still be nice to them even though they do it again. I think I've tried so hard to be what everyone else ants me to be, that I don't even know who I am or who I was anymore. *sigh*

[Robin]

You are exactly who you want to be. It isn't something you discover. It's something you create.

[Nicole.]

What I found helped me "get real", was deactivated my Facebook, because all it brought was anger, hurt and boredom. I stopped talking to people via social sites and instant messengers (I was labelled as anti-social haha) but it just gave me time to be me and relax because I wasn't getting into petty online arguments. Also online "friends" aren't even real! Especially on Facebook they just added you but have no intention of starting a conversation.
You wanna start talking to more people in school. Small talk! Not boring small talk, just talk about last nights episode of xyz or something and the conversation should spring from there, from then on just say hello and smile at those people. Yeah. Worked for me, I felt free, like a bunch of weights had been lifted of my shoulders till it kicked in that I had become anti and don't even want any social sites back, I mean I love interacting with people but, my "friends" are so boring. I probably didn't help, matter of fact I know I didn't lol sorry. Just needed to vent?
I'm jealous too.