Can't trust my boyfriend, fear he will cheat on me? Please help?

[W]

This is more of MY own trust issue than it is my boyfriend's fault but I just CANNOT trust him whatsoever! I want to so badly. He has a lot of female friends, especially on facebook, he tends to "creep" girls profiles a lot, which I don't like but whatever. He has a bit of a flirty personality which worries me. He's never gone behind my back or cheated on me though. He has gone behind my back once actually and hung out with a girl who he had slept with in the past. He didn't tell her he had a girlfriend and they hung out, didn't do anything. I found out by snooping his phone. The text messages weren't flirty at all. However he said he got the impression, from hanging out with her, that she liked him, and he didn't want to hurt her feelings so that's why he didn't tell her about me. After I found out, he texted her and told her he has a girlfriend and he can no longer hang out with her. To my knowledge, that was the first time they'd seen each other in over 3 years, they're old friends. That happened over 8 months ago and it still upsets me!

I constantly snoop his phone, facebook, computer history, everything to look for any reason to lash out at him. I feel completely psycho I haven't snooped his stuff in a while, but I fear that he hides things from me and I'm just looking for any indication that he's being unfaithful or flirty with other girls to confirm my suspicions. He's loyal to me, crazy about me, and very sweet to me.I just want to make sure I'm making the right decision in wanting to spend the rest of my life with him, Im scared he will cheat on me in the future or I'll find some flirty text messages and that'll be it. I don't want this to end in divorce, at some point in the future because we plan on being together for the rest of our lives. He does everything he can to make me trust him and I still can't.

Help
We're in our early/mid-20s, please mature answers only!

[Triesten Espinoza]

No matter how hard you hold on to him if his intentions are to cheat he WILL cheat no matter how hard you hold on. Back off and enjoy the relationship.

[Mir Quasem]

Better to leave a cheat.

[Noorin]

A relationship is all about trust. I believe that you shouldn't snoop around too much cause if he finds out that you snoop around, he might just close himself up further. You're a woman so trust your instincts but make sure they're credible. In other words get hints and clues when you hold conversations with him. Probe him softly occasionally just to check but otherwise, trust him

[Alvin]

Maybe you guys should have a sit down hear to heart about your fears
If you tell him everything then he can better help you
Maybe you could go with him and meets these lady friends and become comfortable with them being friends
But you shouldn't go through his phone or conputer it's his and its personal
But obviously you haven't found anything so he's doing something right

The best of luck to you I hope it works out

[Ps. I love you]

Whoa easy, girl, hold on!! When I first read this I was thinking it was going to be about a guy who had already been caught cheating in the past. But your guy hasn't. This kind of behavior is like waiting for your car to be in a major accident because it 'could' happen. Do you live in this type of constant fear in other aspects of your life? Or, have you been cheated on before? If so, while I can understand your fear, it is unfair to have this guy pay for the mistakes of an ex. Everyone deserves their own chance, but you have to give it to him. This guy seems devoted to you, but encourage him to be more open and up front about what he is doing with you. That way, you don't have to live in what if mode. That being said, you have to be more approachable and quit the snooping. He most likely senses when you get on edge and that is bad for a relationship. Just talk to him. My guy is a photographer on the side. That equals tons of gorgeous, scantily clad models around him all of the time. But, I have never one time checked his phone. Know why? He always tells me where he is, who he's with, and what he's doing. For good measure, he tells me their relationship situations too and always calls me when he's done. I've even met a handful of the girls. But I don't worry. He's honest with me, but in return, I'm trusting of him. I do the same thing. We're partners. I encourage you to try to talk to him and see if you can get him to be honest, but only if you can give him a chance. I hope everything works out for the two of you.

[Brendan]

Why be miserable??? Just leave! Plenty of other fish in the sea

[Brendan]

If you keep up the snooping and constant worry that he is cheating, then the very thing you fear will come true. And YOU will have caused him to back away from you. Would you want a boyfriend who doesn't trust you, even though you've not cheated? The tension of constantly being under suspicion will eventually push him away from you. He's a whole lot more likely to cheat if that's what you expect. You already think so little of him and he doesn't feel valued or respected as a decent guy, so he might as well spend some time with a girl who is laid back and fun. Turn this all around! YOU be the girl who is laid back, fun and trusting. You be the girl he can't wait to see at the end of the day. If you can't stop stressing, snooping & doubting you will lose him. It's all up to you