I don't really have any friends?

[Roxi]

Back in middle school I was bullied pretty badly but for the first couple of years I still had friends. Then my family moved house to like the next village along from where my friends lived. I still got to see them but I had to switch schools, so maintaining friendships wasn't easy. Making new ones was even harder. I'm a shy person - I don't speak unless spoken too until I really get to know someone. I didn't really have any friends at all and got really depressed. Eventually my mum let me switch back to my old school and things got better for a while (although the bullying started up again). The bullying got worse during the last two years there, and towards the end of my last year I just stopped going to school altogether, it was so bad. I went to a different high school, even further out of my "catchment area" than my middle school, and managed to secure a small group of friends, mainly by becoming the girl who will lend you anything. I did some really stupid stuff but I'm not going to go into detail. After a while I started skipping school, and eventually, for the second time, I stopped altogether. I had a lot of time to be with my own thoughts as I would just stay at home most of the time. I began to resent myself for all the stupid things I've done, and am still ashamed. I feel like everyone at my school sees me as the girl I was (which is fair enough). But I get so anxious about going into school now that I'm being home tutored at the moment. I also get counselling which doesn't really seem to be going anywhere. I've changed a lot, and I don't really feel like I have much in common with my friends any more. I only see them a couple of times a month at best, and when I do it's often really awkward, or boring, or something goes wrong. They never ask me to come and see them, and when I make plans with them, a lot of the time they're late. One time I just wondered around for over an hour waiting for one of them because they weren't ready when they said they'd be. The most social contact is when I talk to my cousin over Facebook - we used to be really close, but even she doesn't seem to make much of an effort to talk to me any more. I know it's all my fault for letting things get like this, but I don't know what to do. I'm quite an independent person, but (I know it sounds cliché) I just want to feel loved.

[eddie]

Idk where you live but I just want to strike everyone that goes to your school or has harmed you... On behalf of humans, Roxi, I apologize

[karluz.vs.You]

I want be your friend...you need mind in good things,think in a blue sky,ibmn happy birds.......you can take off this.......my friend........Ask: you understand what I said isn't? Hahahahahahaha....good night!

[keekee]

hay there, i was totally in the same boat as you, i was bullied in primary school ( school you go to from aged 4 to 12), i had some friends but they wernt really my friends, then in secondary school (school from aged 12 to 18) i thought this was going to be a whole new start, to have new friends, new subjects, a whole new expirence. but that wasnt the case, for my 1st year i just went around on my own, was a total loaner, i hated it, i used to go home and cry and ask my mum to take me outa school, but she couldnt. so i stuck it out, then the 2nd year i sorta started hanging around with the nerds, and a pretty much hang around with them until 4th year. in 4th year everything changes, you get new subjects, and your classes change. and i really didnt like my new class. i was being bullied again, and it wasnt just 1 person, it was near the whole class. i really couldnt handle it any more. i told my mom and she called the teacher, who acted as if i was making it all up. they used to leave me out, im not saying i wanted everyone to be around me, but i would have liked to not have people turn the other way when i was walking towards them! so i dropped outa school, and i applied to youthreach, this is a centre in ireland which is a small group of droup-outs, and you end up with the same as what you leave school with, obv if you are in america there is not going to be any youthreach, or even england! but the point im trying to get at is, i started youthreach on a clean sheet, i was shy the first day or 2, and then i MADE myself go over to people and talk to them. believe me, if you go and do it once, its awkard, but after doin it once, the hard part is over even if you start some activity like dancing, or drama, or even just go to a group club where you dont know any one (i say cause you dont know any one incase the bullies might be there, it might be harder for you to get used to being a outgoing person), basically do something that intrests you, cause if you do you will meet people that has the same intrests as you. i was always shy and didnt wana talk to anyone, i was like you, just wanting to be loved. and after being in youthreach i have grew a new confidence, i can do public speaking, i am the life of the party (WITHOUT ALCOHOL) and i am going on to teach drama. i also mix alot easier as i said, if you do it once it gets easier. it does feel like your throwing yourself into the deep end when your 1st doing it, but as long as there nice people, they will not bite! lol i hope i helped i just felt like i had to share my story with you

[Michelle]

Wow,
Call me a weirdo, but I was actually gonna ask for your number or something so we could talk because I literally laughed out loud when you posted on my question 'and make sure you get your jacket back!' Haha. You seem cool enough to get my vote if that means anything..
But anyway, you can't let the opinions of useless people drag you down girl. You gotta love yourself before you want to be ' loved' by your shallow acquaintances.. How about tomorrow, you start teaching yourself how to socialize? Talk to random people at the gas station, anything. Do whatever it takes to get past that timidness without feeling like you're downgrading yourself, or whatever it is that's holding you back. You are worth talking to, as is any other individual, and don't settle for or believe anything else. People that torture and bully people only do such things because they hate theselves, and that's the truth. Just turn off your phone or all your social networking sites and actually comminicate with something that isn't a computer screen, not to sound harsh. People are just people. You have no reason to worry abd wonder if these everyday PEOPLE see you as the old PERSON you used to be or not. If they have anything to say, tell them to kiss your ass and get in line!
Best of luck to you girly