Discovered boyf has been cheating on me with his ex - felt angry but today feel really sad :( HELP!!!?

[Rosie]

Well ive suspected for some time & when asking him if he was cheating he always said no & it usually caused a row!!
Found text msgs to his ex about a month ago - most were sexually but he promised he hadn't slept with anyone except me since he'd known me since last september!!
What a fool I'll tell u!!

He left his phone on the table while we were in a club fri (3am) - came up with a girls name & I answered it!!
Discovered he's not only been having regular weekly sex with his ex of 2 years, they've been trying for a baby for 2 yrs (she already has two kids of her own & is married!!) she left her husband for him a while ago ( I believe theyre now back together) he's been driving over to hers & sleeping with her often ( he could never be bothered about coming to my house!!) he would sleep with me one night & then sleep with her the next, he's also living with his parents at mo & they have allowed him to have both of us staying over & just acting like it's ok!!!!

Found out he hadn't joined Facebook to find old school friends he'd infact been messaging his ex while she was away on holiday with her kids & husband in America!! WTF!! he apparently texts her everyday - sometimes I don't hear from him up to 4 days!!!!

Discovered he'd also joined two dating websites & had been lying to me about msgs!! Stating they were Facebook msgs to mates relatives - works out that evening he wanted me to leave early in order for him & his mate to meet these women!! Again all sexual msgs & hooking up dates/times

So this is where things turned around!!!!!
I edited his dating profile - sent msgs to all his contacts telling them he was a total dirtybag, lier & cheat!! I then woke him up, told him I knew everything & to get out of my house - He tried to tell me he loves me and was trying to cuddle me....I asked him to leave.

He tried to call me early hours sat eve/sun morning - I suspect he was drunk, I didnt pick up the call. His ex text me throughout Saturday afternoon stating he had been ringing her asking to see her!! I feel gutted!!
What type of person does this to someone their meant to love? He wanted me to fall pregnant and said if I did he'd marry me!!?
Proper twisted!

He text me yesterday lunchtime saying sorry with a kiss at the end...I didnt reply.

My friend said he is testing the water and he might be trying to worm his way back into seeing me however im not sure...I think its obvious I was always his number 2 and hes not that bothered.....

I dont think he feels guilt having been with two women for 9 months and not blinking an eyelid at the disgrace of it!!

I feel very upset that he hasnt asked to meet with me to discuss it all...even though he seems to be chasing his ex and wanting to see her....
Before he left he said he had been waiting for something like this to happen for 2 years....he'd have another girl on his arm by the end of next week....
As he left he tried to hug me but I pushed him away and told him to just go....
How can someone do this to someone else? He knew my ex had cheated on me and he was always asking if I was seeing other people, getting jealous and winding me up about it...I can now see why.....

[R.L]

Because SOME men are exactly that ... dirty cheating lowdown scum.

This guy was an absolute b*stard to you and you deserve better. DO NOT take him back, he will not change and will only start doing it all again once he feels he has you back (if you were to take him back).

Chalk this down to experience, do not meet with him as he sounds like a manipulator. Write it off as one very bad experience and try to move on.

There are nice guys out there who will love you and cherish you, but you just have to be patient and judge their characters a bit better. Gut feeling says a lot, but can sometimes send you insane with paranoia. The heartache will pass with time.
Just be patient, and don't think ALL men are the same, please.

[Cheryl K]

Move on Baby,You deserve much better than this. I know you are hurting and you feel like shite, THIS IS NO WAY TO LIVE. Dont dwell on it, he's just plain NO GOOD. GO !!!!

[Nicki]

Oh hunnie this is a horrible thing for any woman to go through and I'm so sorry to hear its happened to you. He is clearly a very immature man whose not ready for a committed relationship and doesn't have the empathy to understand how he's hurt you and the other woman. He needs to grow up and see the carnage that he has created with his childish foolish acts. He obviously doesn't realise the seriousness of his actions and needs to wake up and smell the coffee. It is NOT OK to go around treating women or any human being in this way!

Don't be sucked in by his efforts to reconcile with you. Don't lower yourself to his level, you do not deserve to be treated like that ever. Stay strong, take all your friends support, do not reply to his messages, and soon he will get bored and move on to the next woman whose emotions he can screw with. Hopefully this will make you a stronger person and help you distinguish between the good men in the world who treat you like a woman and deserve your love, and the lowlife that don't know the meaning of love and probably never will until they get a reality check. Do be aware that not all men are like this, you deserve and will find a great man one day who will chase you constantly with texts and calls and will make every effort to see you and will adore you.

Maybe you should go to his parents house and explain their sons actions and how upset it has made you, did his father never show him how to treat a woman? Tell them how you feel and that someone needs to have strong words with this boy, he cannot continue making womens lives a misery and using them in this way.

[Katherine]

DON'T meet with him! There's nothing to discuss. Forget him. You deserve someone better. I know how bad it feels being cheated on, but this guy you described is SCUM. You shouldn't even feel sad.

[Elite]

...It's not just men that can do that.