Urgent help, please. How do I stop this vicious cycle?

[Chloe Bee]

In a nutshell, I've been dating my colleague on and off, his choice not mine since I'm in love with him. Basically one minute he wants me, and he's all smiles with me and the next he avoids me and is cold with me. At first he was ready for a relationship with me and somehow along the road he changed his mind saying he doesn't want to get attached. Also, as I can see from his facebook timeline, he's clearly dating other girls. He even admitted one day that what he does to me is really bad, and he knows suffer from depression (he thinks that's because I'm a weak person), yet he does these things to me. All in all, I know that this is not going anywhere, so I try to erase him from my life, but I keep on blaming myself and I'm so horrified by his attitude towards me that I have been throwing up (I've never had bulimia before), and avoiding to go to work altogether so as not to see him. I don't know how to stop this and I would really really like advice from people who've been through something similar, please, I'm at the end of the rope ...

[Ms.Bubbles]

People can only do to you what you let them; applies under these circumstances.

Stop making excuses. Put your big girl pants on, end it for good and move on. Work on finding a new job if you have to. You're only hurting yourself. The "His choice not mine since I'm in love with him" is bull. You're not in love with him. Love is mutual, this is not mutual. You may be lusting, obsessed but don't mistake that for love here. He's using you. That's about it. You're just a piece of meat to him.... stop allowing it already and take control of yourself. Have some dignity!

[Daniel]

First of all . He's clearly an ass hole. It's his fault not yours don't blame yourself. If he doesn't Want an amazing beautiful girl like you then he deserves nobody. If you really want to keep him talk to him about everything let him know. Hope this helps