After a divorce, is it right for the ex wife to continue using your name?

[tOuz - The Secret]

Im not just talking about the social networks (facebook, twitter) but bank accounts and writing checks.

[Crystal]

well you gave her this last name she can use it until she changes it her self, it just the way it is

[Happy-2]

If she changed her last name when she married you, then it's not just your name, it's HERS too now.

[Poopypuss4]

It's still her name, she can torture you with that forever.

[Murzy]

she can use her name ie. Mary Smith but not your name ie. John Smith

[dr.pepper106]

If it was not stated in the divorce decree that she return to her maiden name then she is legally bound to use the one she has now.

[STEEL]

NO. I DON'T THINK IT'S RIGHT.
My mother and my father got divorced 20 years ago and she still uses the same last name. I'm not sure why, since my father has re-married and since my mother has been with the same guy for the last 18 years. If I were my mother's "common law husband" I would be a little ticked as to why she kept her ex husband's last name. But I think she did it just to spite my father and stick it to his new wife. Even though my mother is the one who left my dad, she's still bitter over the fact that he moved on. So again, to answer your question, no I don't think it's right. What could possibly be the point?

Okay, just read some of the other answers and I guess it makes sense if there are small children involved who don't understand why mommy's last name is different from theirs. And I suppose it makes sense when you're at the school or at the doctors office. But if there aren't any kids involved? Or if they're adults? Then I stand by my previous answer.

[La Vie Boheme]

I'm on the fence about this one. On one hand, it IS actually her legal name but on the other hand, I don't understand WHY a woman would want to keep it. I was married for 18 years and changed mine back to my birthname.

[Mrs. Miller]

If you think about it, when your wife married you, she changed her name to start living her new life.
She changed her drivers license, credit/debit cards, membership cards for everywhere she's a member of, she changed her name with the taxation office, lawyers, etc. Legally, she changed her name to yours, and quite often it comes at an expense.

After you divorce, there are 3 reasons for not changing back: 1- Money. It can become expensive. She would need a divorce certificate, or to change her name via d-poll (i think it's called) Then she would have to go back to the banks, private health people, tax office, etc to change her name back. Again, at an expense.
2- If you have had kids in the time you have been married, she may want to keep the same name as her kids. Having said this though, many women change their name back, and change their kids names to her maiden name.
And finally, 3 - She changed her name to yours to start her new life. Once she is divorced, she doesn't resume her old life, but rather a life different to both. Her new, new life, i guess. You helped make her who she is. Shouldn't she be able to hold on to that?

I got married last year, but I have two kids with my husbands surname. When I got married, I changed my name, not to his name, but to theirs. Technically speaking, it's the same thing, but I separate it. They are my kids, and I believe we should share the same name.

Having said that, If my husband and I ever divorced, I would keep my husbands surname until my children are out of school. Then I would apply to change my name back to my maiden name. If I ever re-married, I would not change my name again. My name is who I am. Not who I'm with.

Now that I think about it, my kids are the only reason I changed my name in the first place. If I had married my husband before we had kids, there would be no doubt that I would have kept my maiden name, because as I said, it's who I am. I don't belong to my husband any more than he belongs to me.

[mmm]

pardon me - but you gave her that name - it now belongs to her