should i tell my 13 year old son that i've found his biological grandmother on facebook?

[elfkin the destroyer]

his father never wanted anything to do with him, but i've always been honest and told him everything i could. today i ran across his biological aunt and grandmother on facebook. both my son and i have facebook, and i'm not sure if i should tell him so that he can make a decision on whether or not to contact either one. any advice?

[.*PriNCeSsNeLly*.]

wow thats kind of tough maybe you should try contacting them first, if they want to talk to him then let it all be on him don't let him do it first they might break his heart and ignore him or say something mean to him like that they don't wanna hear from him. anything is possible you know. butttt you know them better than we or he does if you think they'd be rude and snobby it's only up to you to contact them first not your son so he doesn't have to go through them maybe rejecting him

[raspypear683]

I'd wait until he expresses some interest in tracking down his biological relatives -- then you can "just happen" to stumble upon the information, and take it from there. Adding all these new people into his life is going to bring up a lot of confusing, conflicting emotions in him -- people have enough trouble trying to make sense of it all at 33, let alone 13.

[Bryteyes2]

I would let him know and then have him make the decision on his own.

[firefighter0010]

Yes and No. It depends on rather they want anything to do with him. If they want to be apart of his life, then yes tell him! If not then forget it, you don't want to upset him ext.

[Eldude]

Sheesh!!! That's a tough one. Meeting or getting to know the aunt and grandma might bring dad back into the picture. Would that be okay? It's hard to punish the them simply because his dad wanted nothing to do with him. I'm sure they would like to see him and get to know him, that's only natural. He's 13 though. Since you have always been honest, keep doing so and let him decide. Are they good people? If they are anything like dad, (I'm not saying he's a bad person, but he's not the Greatest Dad obviously) I would keep this one to myself.

Ask yourself this question..............Would you be upset or uncomfortable with him getting to know them and possibly even liking them?
If so, then don't tell him. If you think it would enrich his life, tell him.

[Girly Girl]

well i think you should tell him he needs to know

[Lisa V]

Well I can - in a way- place myself in his shoes. Im 30 and I do not know my biological father. I had always been told that the man who was my father was deceased.Even when I saw a picture of his familt when I was 17, I questioned it again and my mother still insisted that he was my father, and did not want to help me in contacting them. Now at 30, my mother is trying to search for my father. Yes it was wrong for her to hold that information from me. I wished she would have been able to contact my fathers family prior to me asking and then allow me to make the choice in whether I wanted to meet them or not. I still do not know that if he or his family would want anything to do with me or even know about me. As a 30 year old, I STILL dont know how I would handle it if they didnt accept me. Im just grateful that I havent had any sort of health issues ( such as a bone marrow transplant or a blood transfusion) or hidden health issues caused by his genes in which would have required me to contact them. Honestly, find out if his family would want anything to do with him FIRST. If they accept him with open arms, then let him know that you found them. Regardless if his father wants nothing to do with him or even if his dad has said that his FAMILY wants nothing to do with your son, at least TRY to contact them and ask them personally. Just becasue his dad may not want him in his life, does not mean that his family feels the same. As long as you have been truthful with him thats what counts. If he has a dad in his life now and has a positive role model, thats even better! Good luck on this!!!