I don't like it here and want to run away?

[Ellasa]

Hello, I'm a 17 year old girl and I'm turning 18 this December. My father and my mother both died. One when I was 14 and the other when I was 16. So I now live with my 27 year old brother (a doctor) and his wife, and i don't like living with them. I used to love my brother with all my heart but he's changed quite a bit. I've never really liked his wife. They yell at me a lot, and they try to act like my parents. They won't let me go out with my friends or go on certain websites and yell at me a lot if they find out I've been going on them (Facebook, twitter and other social networking websites) I don't get along with them at all! I've always been a "sad" girl but I've gotten mad and sad ever since I started to live with them! So when I turn 18 Ive made up my mind and I want to move out. But my brother and his wife won't allow it. I don't know what to do. Even if I do move out I have no idea where to go. They won't let me go to a college that isn't close from home and they won't let me live in a dorm. Even though I have no idea how to get away I know I can't stay there! I don't want to stay there. It's horrible there. (they don't abuse me) I don't feel Like I fit in there and I don't like being with them. I'm thinking about running away but don't know how to or where to go if I pull it off. Someone please help me I don't know what to do.

[Kevin]

I'm really sorry about your parents no running away is never the answer. More bad can come from running away than good. Bad idea. I don't know where you are in the country but go out, find some friends, and when you're in college things will get a lot better. Maybe you'll have a boyfriend and an arrangement will happen or something. Always keep your head up and try and be positive. You have the strength in you for sure.

[Sass S]

Do not run away as you'll be placing yourself in harms way. I suggest you get a part time job to save money to fund payment on a flat for when you're 18. Here in Australia you are considered an adult at 18 and can leave home. So that's what you should do: in the meantime don't use the social networks at home (try a friends place), do well in school and earn money when you can, so at 18 you can leave. At 18 they can't tell you what to do.
Also remember that your brother is a lot older than you and is probably fearful for your safety seeing you have no parents and also he probably has no experience with adolescents so he's scared and clueless when it comes to you and is probably just trying his best.
Best to toe the line for now, you won't be living with them forever.

[Teresa J]

Without money and family you would be at the mercy of strangers if you run away. I can feel how unhappy you are and I assume you've tried to talk with your brother but it's not working. They may not realize just how unhappy you are.

Find an adult - a neighbor, teacher, pastor, friend's mom - any adult who might talk with your brother for you.

Prepare for some compromise. You may not get everything you want but focus on those things you really, really want to change and have this adult sit down with you and your brother to politely hash-out some of these issues.

Running away may bring it's own kind of horrors, so please stay and try to work this out. Get an adult on your side who can help you.

/

[Amanda]

no you cant run away its wrong you could end up in a worse place than you are in
its sad that your parents died and your brother and his wife don't treat you right but running away is never the awncer (sorry about my spelling) did you try tell ing your brother how you feel

[Mama Mia]

What you do is sit down with them and have a calm conversation about how sad and alone you feel. You act responsibly and you follow the rules in their home. You show by your well thought out plan why you should have certain freedoms at 17. If you behave like an educated and rational individual, they should at least hear you out. if you need to, it might help to have made some notes about the topics you want to cover.
If you are not working, you should be. Life in the real world is tough, and as John Wayne the actor once said. "it is even tougher if you are stupid". To think for one second that you should run off is more than stupid. You have no money saved up. No education to speak of. No particular talent that will make you famous, No place to live, no other relatives who will care if you are cold, sick, hungry or lonely. This world is tough and cruel to girls who jump out there and think they can make it on their own . You will either be turned out by a pimp for prostitution, be introduced to drugs , or living on the street being some dopers old lady. why? because that is what happens in the real world. there are very few people who get the cinderella story. You have had a tough time . losing both parents so young. But life is going to get down right ugly if you dump on your brother and bail out. Of course you are mad. I suspect your brother didn't plan on becoming a pseudo parent to a teenage sister either. he is probably mad too. Does that mean that he would rather worry about you, wonder who is doing you tonight, or if you are being beaten by your pimp? No.
It isn't unreasonable for them to want you to prove yourself by staying close to home the first semester or the first year of college. If you do well, you will be in a much better position to write your own ticket and go where you want to go. Don't think that what you have right now is horrible. What is waiting out there for you is what is horrible and you don't have to be a statistic. So, get along, find a job and do your best in school. Neither one of them is going to have time to watch you that closely as a senior in high school. No teenager is prepared for what life out on your own is like at 18. So do what you need to do to get along, and get along. Stay because you will have a future that is worth living. Running away is always a mistake because you always have to take someone with you. ... yourself, and this life is cold and cruel when nobody cares and you are alone.