How to beat social awkwardness/anxiety?

[Master]

I often find that I have issues talking with people, and making friends, because of this. When I'm talking to people, I'll sometimes stutter, or my mind will go blank. I feel uncomfortable the whole time. Even while talking to my own MOTHER, I find myself stumbling over words.

Help?

[Serene E]

1. Recognize you have choices
Choices equals power. By asking the question, "What are my choices," you have already reclaimed the power that having choices brings. That is the key to reclaiming mental mastery instead of being sucked into victim mentality. And there are ALWAYS choices, even if they aren’t attractive.

2. Make and use affirmations
One of my affirmations is “by our choices we reveal our commitments.” Write down affirmations on index cards that relate to your problems, situations or goals. Even affirmations such as “I am a worthy person”, “I deserved to be loved”, or “Not everyone is perfect” are great to remind ourselves of simple things. Use one daily, keep it with you, take it out and read several times a day. Believe it. Turns a lot of our negative thoughts into positive thoughts.

3. Master your thinking
So often we are slaves to our thoughts instead of master over them. If you are spiraling downward, the solution is to first notice the thoughts (as a voice in your head) contributing to the bad mood. What stories and half-truths are you telling yourself? For example do you tell yourself that you are mostly unemployable, too young, not good enough or destined to live alone? These are stories instead of facts.

The second part of thought mastery is to speak back and take charge. Visually see yourself winking at the voice in your head, then imagine (or say it out loud) "Thank you for sharing." This helps you to acknowledge the negativity then dismiss it as insignificant in light of your choices or commitment.

4. Identify the real problem
Sometimes it’s just easier to get attached to the drama and the story than to make a commitment to change a bad habit or shake things up in a bad situation or personal relationship. Asking the question, "Where would I be without this drama?" can help you identify the real problem, and create new choices. What are the "benefits" you are indulging in from all that drama? (Do you get more attention from others? Does it make you feel powerful? -- Perhaps the real problem is that you aren't applying your creativity enough or don't spend enough time caring for yourself.)

5. Release resistance
Stuck energy sometimes needs to be moved. If you are in a really bad mood, instead of beating yourself up, dedicate a period of time to sulk, be angry and feel the mood. In other words, accept "what is". Releasing the negative energy this way, can help you open the door for seeing a possible solution. When you make this conscious choice to release the resistance, you put yourself back in control instead of being a victim to negativity.

[Ruben Acosta]

it is funny i have the same issue sometimes with my dad, but it is completely normal to feel anxiety in the first time you meet someone, this feeling will die over time so just wait and see it for yourself: you made a bunch of friends in that time, also trying to speak with people with similar likes to yours can help you improve your social relationships to others maybe one day you will be a very confident person, just give time to time, i hope this can help you.

[Bud B]

Try these resources:
http://www.stutteringhelp.org there are videos online that show speech therapists working with stutterers; watch them and learn some techniques.
http://stutteringselfhelp-stutteringself...gspot.com/
http://stutteringhelp-bud.blogspot.com/
http://notesonstuttering.blogspot.com/
http://www.friendswhostutter.org/
http://www.stuttertalk.com/

Meet others who stutter here
http://www.stutteringforum.com
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/stutteringchat/
Stuttering Foundation on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/stutteringfoundation

"Self Therapy for the Stutterer" published by The Stuttering Foundation of America worked wonders for my family members who stuttered after working through it step by step. The book can be found here http://www.stutteringhelp.org/Portals/En...1th_ed.pdf . It is great for those who do not have access to speech therapy.

Advice to Those Who Stutter
http://www.stutteringhelp.org/Portals/En...ay2010.pdf

The Foundation also has a list of speech therapists worldwide who have been trained to work with stutterers.

Each stutterer is different, and a therapist who specializes in treating stuttering will be able to determine what will help you the most as they work with you.