What is the best way to get a teen to communicate?

[Nicey]

Trying to build up a relationship with a niece who has moved half way across the country. She is a teen and sometimes talks while other times ignores. Is this normal? If so, what can I do to increase communication with her? (Like ways to get her to talk). She is sixteen.

[Nicholas]

If she ignores you with a slight angry look, she just doesn't want to talk
If she does this AND turns sad sometimes, she's depressed

[QuintusNemo]

What do you expect from a sixteen year old teenager? I was the same at her age. I managed to improve my vocabulary and grow out of my shyness and social ineptitude.
She is not an adult.
Be a good role model and lead by example.

[I know everything]

Find things to like about her and then tell her. Just stay out of her way and let her be attracted to you. Over time she will feel good around you and then she will open up.

[Jasie]

Teenagers, especially girls, are complicated to deal with. They are ALL different, but, however, they all need the same thing. You can't just make them communicate with you over night. The best way, is to try to connect with them and try to relate to them from when you were a teen. But no matter what, make sure she knows that you'll be there to talk too if she needs someone and make sure you listen. And it is totally normal for her to change her moods. After all she is a teenage girl I hope this helps!

[Jovet]

Find a group of 16 year old girls and leave them alone? Give her a telephone?

Or do you want her to talk to YOU? That's a tough one. Teenagers, at least most teenage girls, tend not to enjoy talking to older relatives. Young, cool adults in their early 20's may be OK, but for the most part, unless you share their interests, you are toast.

Does she have a Facebook page? If so, see if she will let you friend her and check her interests, then learn about them. Are you able to spend any substantial time with her? See if she would be interested in learning any of your hobbies, or see if she would like to learn a hobby with you. Knitting, crafting, sewing, and cake decorating are all "older" hobbies that are gaining popularity among youth. Maybe help her design a dress or how about a Halloween costume, if you have the talent? Or sports, rafting, antiquing, hiking, photography, cooking.. the list goes on. If you can't think of anything, look through your local rec directory for a class you can take together. You didn't say if she moved away or to you; but these hobbies and goals and classes can be shared through web chats as well. The best way to create a bond of friendship is through shared adversity: overcoming an obstacle together, creating what psychology calls a superordinate goal. You have to communicate to accomplish that.

The key is going to be to find the things you are good at, that you love to talk about, or that you are interested in, and matching things for her. She is at the age where she is able to start trying all the hobbies out and see what fits her, and this is the age when we (psychologically) briefly re-bond with our families before we turn our attention outwards to create a family of our own. Ask what she would like to do and be courageous enough to try it - be the "cool aunt!" Then she won't stop talking to you.

Have fun!