My relationship is on the rocks, PLEASE HELP!?

[lovelost.]

I'm 20 in college, I have been with my boyfriend for over a year now. I love him deeply. College just resumed about a week ago, and all of a sudden I find myself being very upset and irritated with him. HE threw a couple of welcome back parties. I don't really like when my boyfriend dances with other girls. Dancing in our generation =grinding, popping, dancing extremely vulgar. Its just uncomfortable for me watching him do that with other females, but he wants to still do it because he says its all a part of having fun and he doesn't want to look back on his college years and think that he didn't have fun because of restraints being put on him. Anyways, he was getting a lapdance from a girl at the first party. That's when I flipped and left the party. We had a huge fight. The next night, he was dancing with some girls and I left the party again. We talked about it, but we didn;t really come to a soultion because he still wants to dance with other girls. He doesn't even have any issues with me "grinding/dancing" with another guy, it doesn't make him upset at all. To him, it's "just dancing" and we both know we're together so it doesn't matter. But I still hate seeing him grind on girls, get lapdances etc.
Thats ONE thing that has turned me off from him.
The second thing is, there is a girl who is known to flirt with other guys' boyfriends and make subtle passes at them. We both are kind of friends with her. But he goes out his way to text him and to pay her visits on occasion. I don't understand why? Especially when I confronted him about his flirting with her about a year ago.
The third thing is that, recently on his twitter, he tweeted one of his ex girlfriend to call and text him asap. I look in his phone and he has deleted most of the messages he has sent her. It makes me think he is hiding something. (and yes I know I am wrong for being in his phone)
all of this stuff has happened in the first week of school, it's just way too much and i find myself always angry with him and I don't want to see him,
what should I do?
I don't even know how to confront him or the situation

[Howl]

If you really aren't getting comfortable with him scare him into saying were gonna be over. Then he'll change for sure and if he doesn't get OVER HIM he obviously is getting u stressed out. He doesn't seem to care about your feelings and how your love is going out. Confront him into saying Were over cause then he'll be on his knees for forgiveness and then u will give in. And he'll probably never do that again! :'3 hope i helped

[Sunshine]

Woah! Hold up!
First off, if you're in a relationship together, why are you allowing him to get grinded on by other females? He obviously wants to be single. Visiting the chick who likes to flirt with other girls' boyfriends...um....you have no idea what those two could be doing. And texting the ex girlfriend is just way out of pocket. He needs to be dropped immediately. I obviously don't know you. Man, I can't believe he had the nerve to have girls giving him lap dances! Like really? You should of knocked his d*** in the dirt! I hate when these a**holes get over on wonderful women who try to make the relationship work. Find someone else, don't try to make the relationship work, because he obviously doesn't care about you!

[angelsworld2007]

The way you are feeling is not wrong. It is wrong for him to be dancing with those other girls and to allow them to do what they are doing. Just because this is something that young people do edoesn't make it right. IF you love someone, you won't want to do any of that with anyone else and you won't approve of them doing it either. It sounds to me like he isn't serious about your relationship, like he wants to play the field. He wants to have his cake and eat it too, and that doesn't work.

[Merrystew886]

Starting college means you have no time for social life. Let him go and focus on your education.

He will not change. He doesn't care for you one bit if he doesn't mind you dancing with other guys. It simply gives him permission to do the same, or worse. He would've loved for you to hook up with someone for a one night stand, because this would give him the green light to do the same. You are not #1 for him anymore. Face it. Deal with it. Let him go.

Do a big fight, in his face, throw at him everything you've got, DON'T let him put in a single word. Make it loud and obnoxious. Tell him what you want to tell him to seal the door for either of you to want to reunite. Say what you need to say, turn around and leave. Leave with him what is his. Take from him what is yours. Don't explain yourself, not one word. Do not be considerate, or kind, or soft. Be rude, just no name calling. If you can swear, do.

Your mind is already made up. What other sign are you waiting for? Do you want to catch him with another girl in your bed? Will that do it for you? He communicated to you, in more ways than one, that you no longer matter. Are you going to wait until he takes a dump on you? What insults are you willing to take until you say, ENOUGH?

Not tomorrow, break up with him tonight, or never call yourself a woman.

I am harsh, but you need to hear this.