Should I runaway with my best friend?

[Alicia]

My question is simple: Should I run away? I'm a 14-year-old girl in NY. I'm physically healthy, though I've been on antidepressants for some time now. Things are getting a bit difficult for me. My dad is an alcoholic, we can barely afford bills and food, and my father only comes home a couple times every month. There's been times he has forgotten who I was. He has hit me before, and I don't doubt he'll do it again. I live in a very small town. My life at home and school is starting to feel unbearable. I've been planning to run away for months now, and have been researching it intently. Now, within the last three months, I started talking to this boy. He's 15, and his mom has taken him out of school a week ago to be homeschooled. Lately, he's the only person I've talked to, and according to anyone at school who has attempted to speak to him, he only responds to me. He's told me about his life at home, and I've witnessed it on webcam with him. His brother and father abuse him, and his mother only agrees with his brother, not really caring much for him. I've told him I loved him like a brother, and I actually have a small bit of a crush on him, though it's something I could easily get over. He's also told me he loved me, but he never specified in which way. He's also extremely healthy physically. We both experience severe suicidal thoughts. It scares the crap out of me whenever he tells me that he wants to die, because he's honestly the only thing I care for in life. I told him he has so much to live for, because honestly, he does. He's an extremely talented vocalist, and could probably make it as a singer. He's also smart, an honor role student, and a great chef. He's someone who would always talk to me, and had been the only person who actually makes my suicidal thoughts stop when I talk to him. I've hinted that I wanted to find an escape without ending my life. And a couple weeks ago, he said that we should run away together. I honestly want to. We've decided where we would go, and how we would get there. We both have some money, I have about $150, and he has $200. We would leave in the spring, when it's starting to get warmer. We've arranged with one of my old friends in the town we plan to go to (The town is about two states over) that we'd be able to shower at their house. I would dye my hair and get piercings, and he would too. (I've helped people pierce themselves before) We know how we'd make money, and are aware that we can't really get true jobs without birth certificates. I feel pretty sure of this decision, because it's a way to escape from the pain, without taking my own life. And if need be, we could always return. A little more about myself will do I guess. I'm bullied. I'm 5'1" in stature, and I'm 95 pounds. According to people who videochat me over oovoo, or look at my facebook pictures, I'm pretty in their opinion. I'm a straight-A student, my lowest average being in Health with a number of 95. More about my friend is that he's 5'8", 129 pounds, and an A/B grade student. He was always the popular kid, though he never has any real friends. He no longer goes to school, as I previously stated, his mom took him out. I'm pretty sure he cares about me, as one time I did end up in the hospital for overdose, he was my first visitor, before my father. He was crying, which is something he never does, and told me how he was trembling with his knife when he heard I was almost dead, telling me if I was dead, he was going to die too. So... should I leave this town with him?

[Alicia]

Run away to the police station. Tell them everything no matter how small. They will help you

[Approved]

Call Times Square Church in Manhattan 212-541-6300 and take the advice they give you.

[Anthony]

Running away is not the solution! Talk to a school counselor or the pastor at your local church. Suicide is NOT the answer either. Have faith that if you seek help, you'll receive it. Call this #, 1-800-streetsoldiers for help! NOW!

[Aaron]

DONT RUN AWAY!!!!

BUT

Dont stay with your father if he beats you. Try finding a way to get legaly moved out of your homes, such as Child Protective Servfices (search DCFS on google). Try and arrange to have a friend or relitive become your legal gaurdian, this way you can both continue schooling, yet be together and be out of the environment that hurts you. Unless you know alot about this boy and trust him A SHIT TON, dont run away from him. It would probably be best if you could both call DCFS and try to get a relative set as your legal guardian.

Running away, not having birth certifacates or a highschool diploma, and being alone with a boy your not too familiar with is VERY VERY DANGEROUS. It will simply lead to a harder life. Unless you plan to live homeless, squatting on land, or living somewhere remote in a primitive way, dont run away.

Its very dangerous being out in the world at such a young age. You have no money, 350 dollars wont get you shit. Plus, running around without protection is dangerous. If your 95Lbs it would be very easy for you to be kidnapped, raped, injured, or mugged.

If he was about to kill himself if you died, that could show that he is emotionaly unstable. This is a HUGE DANGER.


I would recomend calling DCFS. http://www.ocfs.state.ny.us/main/cps/ here is a link.

Please dont risk yourself!!! Running away will be very dangerous! You will most likely come to REGRET RUNNING AWAY.

Please please please, dont do this, call someone who can help, be it DCFS, family, or another adult (school counelor) you can trust.


I hope you dont run away, please make a safe choice

-Aaron

[funny_cats16]

Logically speaking, no. You shouldn't. You don't have anywhere near enough money to begin, for starters, and life by yourself at such a young age is extremely difficult even if your father doesn't do enough for you (and likewise with your friend). There are also physical risks involved with this. Even though you may be fit, you can't outmatch an adult. Kidnapping is more likely than you think and you would be much safer off staying where you are for the time being.

But personally, if you asked me, I would say go for it. Not only because I can't really stop you from Canada, but it would it make for good stories to tell your kids when you get older (and trust me, WAIT until you're way older) It would give you a new outlook on life. If you have no real ties other than this boy where you live, then really, there's nothing stopping you. I would suggest making up aliases, though, so you aren't found as easily. Also, take self-defense classes and start thinking about what you want to take with you now so that you can stock up over time. Take one or two things here or there to add to your pack and stay away from drugs. It may be cool or relaxing or help you get away from shit, but in the long run it does nothing but ruin yourself and you have to end up facing your problems anyway. Your OD at the age of 14 is very unsettling. I have a younger sister who's about that age and it would completely destroy her development as a person and I don't think I could trust her by herself anymore. Not to mention it would kill me to not have been able to prevent it. That guy cares about you so don't be doing stupid stuff or you will regret it. Sorry if this was all over the place, I've been up for more than a day.