What to do when family becomes too much?

[Alicia]

My family has been there for me, but now that I'm progressing in my own life they try to tear me down and make me feel bad all the time. I made a huge change in my life and have accepted Christ into my life. My family approves of it but often mocks me and tells me I try to do too much and push myself with my church. What is the problem exactly? I'm confused as to handle the situation. Do I step away from family or what?

[Gary Irish]

Family is blood, and most are generally supportive, but there are always other issues that can creep in such as jealously, fear that you are happier than they are, scared to see you step away from their inner circle and such.

The best thing to do is be honest. When they say something that hurts your feelings or offends, let them know sternly, yet tactfully.

The best time to step away from family is when they are abusive, too negative for you, unforgiving, and just bad for you. I think some people think if they step away, their family will change, that they will take notice not let you get that far from them, as you would think a family would do, but often many are fearful of crucial conversations, the tough talks, and will often assume you do not want them in your life. That's a dangerous path if you are just trying to punish or change them by indirectly not being with them.

On a side note, I would probably be the same way about a religious following at first. I am not real religious, but I understand that for some people it's their universe, and center. If this is what you like and need, then pursue it. I think to walk that way in life, you have to forgive others for what they do not like or accept. That's the hard part.

You could also adopt a stoic idea that you acknowledge nothing that bothers your tranquility.

[Good Life by Love]

I have been there. The best thing to do is focus on you to make sure your a lighthouse beaming of light to attract them. Slow to speak quick to listen. If and when they come just be meek.

I like to just add because maybe I got your attention: Recommended to take it slow, take time to get to know the person. Try to keep things clean, less baggage. Let 7 years of perfect relationship before marriage. After 7 years of perfect marriage then a child if desired.

If things are minor I usually just wouldn't even give it a second thought. If it is major I just fix it the best way and that's it. Maybe this will be a good method for you guys. Always reinforce it with Love

Either way for later as a wife if you decide make sure to take care of him always in the love making area. I hope you can be stay at home wife ([no school]events with guys around unless your husband is there 100%) that takes care of all the woman things and he is taking care of all the man things like lifting, fixing working outside and handling all those jerks, and if you do work outside you know what I mean. I hope you can be a home wife so the marriage can be a loving one with peace.

Always talking is good. Find a private place to talk with time to talk. Never teach, just inform if necessary and in a meek manner. Handle the kids and teach them with few words and listen well, pay attention to details. If some parts kids can't be handled then inform the husband.

Be a good wife and make sure all the cooking and cleaning is done. Stay Fit, Smell Good, Dress well. Make sure to make love when ever either of you want.

Be meek. Quick to listen, slow to speak. Only tell him things when needed. Never teach him. If you do tell him something make sure it is kindly. Handle the kids, and if you notice you can't for sure then inform him in a kindly way.

Hugs and kisses are always good any time, instead in front of the guys otherwise the guys might want some too. Make sure to let him know to keep the making love part private.



On another note you seem to be a very nice person, so I like to add that what ever person you want a serious relationship with, take your time (years) and really really really see if this is the person you will spend your whole life with. If you can even better never get married and just enjoy your life with nothing serious, make sure the other party knows your intentions. I also like to add though, in marriage it is a different kinda love, a very valuable kinda love. Always do whats best for everyone like what you did when you asked this question,

Try your best. Love like you never love before. This is the best way for love to come and start surrounding your life. May love be around you, through you and is you.

Love and the Good Life will come

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P.P.P.S. Majority of my answers are for the majority, there are many variables to consider always
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