How would a female who's really insecure about her looks act around girls who are extremely beautiful?

[why]

I just want to know if this is normal...Growing up I was always really ugly and I always felt inferior...because I had really short hair that would never grow, ugly buck teeth, ugly skin...I had really low self esteem.

I believe I'm straight. Well I know I'm straight, I'd never want to date a girl, fool around sure but nothing more....

Ever since I was about 8, I would become obsessed with the prettiest girls in school. I'd always stare at them, want to be their friend so badly but admire then from afar. And when I actually did speak to them I'd be really nervous and awkward...

I'd say about every school year I had an obsession over some really pretty girl. And in class I found myself always looking for someone who was really pretty/stood out...Then in 10th grade I met this extremely gorgeous girl but she was different...She was PERFECT and many other people thought so...she received so much attention yet she was really cool calm and collected...which made me obsess over her even more. I'd always look forward to classes with her yet dread them at the same time because I would get extreme anxiety around her. My heart would beat really fast, I'd literally shake...Before every class I'd have to mentally "prepare" myself before seeing her. I know this sounds really creepy and weird but I always had to have a water bottle with me to drink to calm me down...

I thought about her (and still do a lot sometimes and I'm 17 now...I met her when I was 14-15..) all day, everyday. I would come home and get on Y!A and ask a lot of questions about her...I don't know if maybe I was just jealous of her? But I do know she was BEAUTIFUL and I just loved everything about her, she's everything I wish I was

...Independent, beautiful, stylish, cool and calm, always does and says things at the perfect time, has a lot of guy friends, all the teachers love her, people do double takes when she walks by....She could be sitting quietly alone and people will just be staring at her admiring how pretty she is. Whenever we have to work in groups, she doesn't ask anyone...people ask her or just scoot her over to them...

I always felt so ugly, so I'd be really quiet around her, sometimes I'd avoid her, or not even go to class because I'd probably have an anxiety attack if I was around her...When I did talk to her, I'd be really eager and overly excited and I could tell she'd get a little uncomfortable because she would scratch her head as if she felt "uneasy"...I remember I'd always tell her how pretty she looked...

I was/am like obsessed with her. I constantly look at her facebook, twitter, instagram. And her friends and family's facebooks also...just to be nosy... I'm just always thinking about her...but it's gotten a bit better now.

Well anyways...then about half way through Junior year, I became a lot better looking, I got more confident and just felt happy with myself and I notice I stopped obsessing over her a little...I mean, I was still like "in deep admiration" with her, still thought she was amazing and beautiful...but I was more relaxed around her, could actually keep conversations going with her without getting extremely nervous. I could actually just be NORMAL around her, stop avoiding her and actually open up to her...And she is really friendly with me. Since 10th grade she was always trying to become my friend and complimented me a lot...I was so surprised someone like her actually liked me..

But some days when I feel really insecure and ugly, I find myself becoming obsessive over her and nervous around her again...When I feel really ugly, I won't even go to the classes I have with her, I;ll avoid her, avoid eye contact with her if I do...I'm a mess...this is embarrassing =P

[Unnati]

Well, when I find someone very pretty I stalk them too, but I don't get nervous or anything.
If it's jealousy, you'll know it is.
I think you may have had a girl crush on her.
Or a proper crush.
It's fine, most girls could be bi these days.
You would find out yourself.. I can't really tell whether or not you had/have feelings for her, but I think you do.

[broadcreator784]

I don't think it is as much about your looks that made you feel intrigued and interested in her.
Based on your description, I agree that it seems as if you have a 'girl' crush on her.
Maybe you are not sexually attracted to her, but you definitely seem to exhibit behaviours that show you are physically attracted to her.