Good tweets for Twitter?

[SomeGuy]

One of the popular trends in my area now is "#WhenIWasLittle"

I thought of lots of things I used to do but I want you guys to tell me which is one is the funniest or the one most likely going to get favorited and retweeted.

#WhenIWasLittle I used to close the fridge slowly to see the light closing.
#WhenIWasLittle I used to act like I'm asleep so my parents could carry me to bed.
#WhenIWasLittle I thought that babies came from poop...

Feel free to reward any of these...They're all true but I'm fine with posting something that I didn't actually do in my childhood. Thanks!
And if it's not much to ask for, give me tips on how I can gain more followers, I'm new to twitter...

[RonJeromy]

yolo #swaqq

[★ King☆]

lol you're sad bro. i can tell you dont have many followers lmao

Edit:

#WhenIWasLittle I used to act like I'm asleep so my parents could carry me to bed.

Change it to:

#WhenIWasLittle I used to act like I'm asleep so my parents could carry me to bed, because I was too lazy lol.

that sounds better. AND BTW im stealing that tweet

[Brooke]

if you have a device that can get apps than get -funnyjokes- by swisscode monkeys and steal stuff off of there

[Australia]

Im not poupular on twitter either, dont take it personally.