How do I break up with my boyfriend?

[Grace]

So I am 20 years old and I've been dating a guy who is almost 26 and we have been going out for 6 months now. Everything was fine at first. But now I am convinced he has terrible relationship skills. He says things like I am important and he doesn't want me to feel like his spare time. However he always says yes to more work, shows and hanging out with people other than me. Every time I go to talk about it he says he'll work on it or that its not like that and again I'm most important. But actions speak louder than words. If I go to break up with him he practically has a mental break down. I can't get him to see that he is putting me second best. He seems to only want to hang out in his spare time and I don't really want to waste time on someone that doesn't fit my needs.

[lady]

I would simply phone him and say that you appreciated his time and getting to know him but you aren't dating anymore. Then hang up. Dome take any more calls or emails or visits. A clean break.

[kaylee]

Best thing is tell him how you feel. Explain to him

[Rahul]

Ending a relationship is a difficult decision, here are some tips to help you out.

1. Do it yourself - In person. Don’t text, email or tell him/her over the phone, or even have a friend do it for you. Give your soon-to-be ex the respect he deserves in hearing the words from your mouth and in seeing you tell him in person. Do not try this:

> Breaking up over the phone
> Breaking up by text message (or Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, email etc)
> Lying to avoid the real issues
> Creating elaborate plans to make Him to break up with YOU.

2. Pick an appropriate place to break up - Choose a place where your partner will be able to get emotional or ask questions. You owe him/her the opportunity to talk to you about why you’re letting him go.

3. Allow enough time for your partner to process the information - Remember, you’ve known for some time that you were going to break up, but it might take a few minutes for your partner to be okay with the news. Don’t just tell him you’re ending it and get up and leave. Allow a few moments for the news to sink in, and then ask him if he has any questions.

4. Be respectful Don't devolve into a swearing match - No matter how you feel right now, remember that there was something about this person that drew you to him. Don’t diminish his character or criticise him or become verbally abusive.

5. State your reasons for breaking up in a straightforward but thoughtful manner - Even if he has hurt you, don’t say purposefully mean things to get back at him/her.

6. Don’t suggest you two can remain friends if you have no intention of doing so - Using this line is a cop out and will only serve to give your partner false hope.

7. Wish him the best and mean it - It can be a scary thing to break up with someone who isn’t right for you. Trust that you are doing the right thing for you and your partner.

8. Lock your Heart up and Toss the Key - Being extra nice will do no good. Actually, it may give the other the sensation that you are second guessing your decision. Don't start the "I need time to think it over" cliche. This will be perceived as if you are leaving the door slightly open to hopes.

9. Give your ex some space - It’s natural to be curious about how your ex is doing. It’s also possible that you’ll want to make yourself feel better by hanging out with someone you know is still into you, but doing so is immature and will only serve to hinder you in moving forward. Avoid hanging out or keep showing up at the places you know your ex will be, just because you’re bored or because seeing him gives you an emotional high, until you’ve given the break up some time to absorb.

10. Avoid Yo-Yo Effects - Be determined to break up. Don't break up and get back again. This will only prolong an already pitiful situation. Breaking up and coming back, creates a frustrating yo-yo effect which will wreck only havoc in your life. Your ex may take the break up in a stride at first, but then call or email you begging for a second chance. Remember that you are breaking up with him for a reason, so don’t second-guess yourself. If you receive a call or email from your ex, tell him politely once that you will always care for him but your relationship is over.

11. Strictest Rule to Follow >>> If you are having Sex then ----"No Sex With the Ex" - Look, I know it will be tempting and most likely there will be occasions that he/she will try and tempt you or request you to have sex just for old times sake!!!! However, when this happens, keep one thing in mind: YOU BROKE UP. You will never get over your ex if the two of you have Sex after the break up. So when you see your ex contemplating (or tempting) you for one more roll in the hay, just for the heck of it, repeat to yourself: "NO SEX WITH THE EX".

12. Aftermath - Don't openly discuss the contents of the breakup. That's between you and the other person. It's quite possible that you'll horribly embarrass him if you start gossiping about what happened, so clam up and keep your problems to yourself.
Good Luck>r