have no idea what to do with this guy, please help!?

[Jessica Wilfred]

hi, first let me start off saying that I'm fifteen, (insert eye roll here) but anyhow, I'm not normally the boy crazy type. I normally just stick to doing school work and hanging out with friends. I have not dated, kissed, or had sex like my friends have. I met the guys named deangelo in sixth grade. he was really easy to talk to. he was funny and a big dork. i started seeing as time went by he started changing a little. like for instance he used to be really into rock music like me but his guy friends made fun of him for it and so he went to rap and what was popular. But other than that, he was still very sweet and dorky. I got homeschooled for ninth grade because of bullying and because a guy inappropriately touched me at a school dance and deangelo actually punched him when he found out but anyway, now im in tenth grade and I still like him a lot. I haven't seen him in a year and a half and I still really like him which is actually depressing in a way. I finally got the courage to call him (i had his number because he posted it on twitter but he didn't have mine.) and when I did he was really really happy to talk to me and we talked for hours. but he asked me a personal question asking if i was still a virgin because he saw one of my pictures and he said I got a lot prettier since he last saw me but anyway... He's the only guy i'm open with about that stuff and so I said yes and he sounded really glad and he told me he was too even though his ex and his friends were pressuring him about it. anyhow we talked some after that and texted but I was normally the one that initiated the conversation so I figured i was friend zoned. we were texting and he accidentally sent me a text that was supposed to be to his ex and it wasn't anything graphic or anything it's just that I realized that his text to her was longer than his texts to me. so I took that as a sign that he's just not that into me. so I stopped texting and he did too. I guess it kinda just hurts when she hurt him badly and here im the one helping him through tough times like when his mom put a restraining order on his dad or when he was sick, and with wrestling issues. I would always comfort him and even cry for him. I understand that I haven't told him yet but come on, it's pretty obvious. anyway we haven't talked for a month and I was talking to my friends and they all groaned when I said I liked him. I didn't unerstand what was up with them seeing as they liked him a year and a half ago. I went to visit one of my best friends. she told me the reason why their reaction was like that was because he had changed. she said he does everything to impress his friends and he tries to get with girls so he can impress them. she said he's had sex a lot. I told her that it couldn't be because he told me he was a virgin but she was like no, I doubt it. I don't like to believe what others say but I believed her. she wouldn't lie and the things h posts on twitter is kind of arrogant now and now alll the pictrures he takes are of his abs with a cocky smirk on his face. he looks a lot diffrent than the guy I used to know. I going back to public school for eleventh grade so what should I do? why would he say that he was a virgin if he wasn't and why did he say he was glad that I still was? Just to get me and brag to his friends? but it doesn't seem like he's into me so that doesn't make friends. I've been trying to stop liking him but it's hard. what's your take n all this madness?

[Paul R]

Young lady, first thing, break up what you have to say into paragraphs, it makes it easier to read. Also take out the irrelevant stuff so it's shorter.

"I know a guy, we talked and we told each other we're virgins, but I met a girl who claims to be his ex-girlfriend and she says he's had sex, a lot, now I see his pictures on Facebook and he's showing off a lot, and I'm not sure who's lying to me."

He might be lying or he might not be; a guy will say just about anything to get laid, and yes, they do lie. Or she could be lying to try to drive you away from him so she can now have (exclusive) access to him.

Clearly one of them is lying to you. Let's also not forget, guys who admit they are a virgin get teased a lot, so he may be lying to everyone else but not to you. All you can do is watch and wait. Now, consider, would it have mattered to you if he just liked you and wanted you (sexually) but admitted he wasn't a virgin? It is so common for people to lie - both ways, sometimes they claim they're a virgin or fewer lovers than they had, and sometimes they claim they've had sex before when they're still a virgin - because they're afraid the truth will scare the other person away. And sometimes people are shocked by the truth. It's so common that I don't even really see it as much of a lie.

If you like the guy and might want to have sex with him at some point in the future - especially if whether or not he's a virgin doesn't matter - then you could talk to him about it.

Presumably you're not so horny you really want to have sex right away, so what you can do is watch both of them. People who lie will repeat it. Perhaps you can contact him anonymously over social media like Facebook or Twitter using a new account, an alias so that he doesn't know it's you, pretend to be someone else and see if he admits he is, or isn't, a virgin. Or try to find out if she's likely to lie about things. But if you do this take the information to your grave, don't tell them you were spying on them, especially if you find out they were telling you the truth.

I have no idea what to tell you other than that you'll just have to watch what happens and see.

Good luck, you're gonna need it.

[Veronica C]

I hear wedding bells...