What is it like moving across the country?

[emileelayolay]

Hi. okay so my dad is in the army. He's a Colonel. I've lived in Virginia since 2003, i've never moved before.. well i have but i was a baby so i don't remember it. My dad recently got told by his assignment officer that after he finishes the job he is at now (which will end in june) that we will have a really huge chance if we want to, to move from Virginia (where i live now) to California.

I'm really torn because i've always wanted an adventure and to go someplace new where i don't know anyone, but my heart is also telling me that i can't leave this place because its home and where my friends are.



what are some tips in dealing this with myself, and with my two best friends.

i would really appreciate it if you answered. thank you

[Barbara B]

This is a good question, dear one. I'm glad you asked it.

first of all, not only thank you to your dad for his service to our country - but an even BIGGER thank you to YOU and your family - who must follow in order that your dad may serve. You're quite the young adult, my dear.

Ask your dad if you can speak with your base chaplain and/or the office of dependents (I don't remember the exact name) for some first-hand tips on what it's like to move across country.

In the meantime, it's really important to keep a good attitude. There will be times between now and June that you will be sad, or angry, or excited, or overjoyed. That's normal. But keep a positive attitude no matter what. Fortunately, you understand that your dad's job is what keeps a roof over your head - and that he's not moving just to be selfish.

Yes, this will be an adventure. You will say goodbye to people, places and things that you have known for nearly 10 years. That will be the sad stuff.

On the other hand, you will have an opportunity to see and do things that your friends in VA may never have the chance to do and see. You will have the opportunity to make new friends - different kinds of friends from your early childhood playmates - but just as near and dear; and just as important to you.

The cool thing about living in this day and age is that there is electronic communication available. When I moved from Richmond, VA to Champaign, IL, the Internet was just beginning. Videoconferencing was a dream in someone's eye. Facebook was not even on the horizon. cell phones were the size of briefcases (they were called bag phones then) and looked like walkie-talkies from WWII. Now you can Skype with your buddies, keep in touch with social media and cell phones fit into a pocket. That means you can keep in touch with those whom you cherish.

But the most important thing is your attitude. Keep that - even when the sky is darkest. You're right - it's an adventure!

best of luck, kiddo.

[Allura]

I live in North Carolina right now. I moved here from California and it was very different. The best thing to do is not let it bother you and still remain yourself. If the people there don't like you oh well. fitting isnt all its cracked up to be. its more fun to stand out.

[Mircat]

Get used to moving. Military people don't stay in places for long periods of time. It sounds like you beat the record staying where you are now. It takes a certain kind of personality to get used to leaving it all behind and starting over. Wish your friends the best but don't make big gushy promises to stay in touch and call, and write, and text, and go visit. Most of it won't happen or will stop within a few months. Just wish each other the very best futures and suggest keeping in touch on birthdays or holidays or when something important happens. If you contact in between fine but don't make a big deal out of promising because when it all becomes a big bore and you have nothing in common any more, it makes it difficult to let go then. If your friends are military brats then this all changes because they understand and who knows you might wind up on the same base again one day.

http://spousebuzz.com/blog/2012/08/the-s...ships.html - while this is talking about wives, it might work for friends too.

http://www.teenink.com/nonfiction/person...tary-Brat/

http://www.ong.ohio.gov/frg/FRGresources...ildren.pdf

"You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you. ~Frederick Buechner"

[tehabwa]

It's impossible to know what it will be like, since CA is a HUGE state with a lot of different areas in it.

Keep in touch with your friends. You have the Internet -- which makes it really easy to keep in touch.

And, yes, it will be an adventure, and yes, it's also scary.

Don't you know other military kids where you are? If so, you can talk to them about what moving has been like for them.