marriage advice needed?

[Mrs.Z]

My husband verbally abuses me...only when we are alone.He has a different personality when anyone else is present.I have 2 kids left at home and am stuck.I can't leave.Help.

[Katie]

Mrs Z there is no such thing as cant leave ?
Your just scared to that's all
Take your kids go to a friend or family and end this abuse
He maybe Mr nice guy to everyone else
But you and your kids don't deserve to live with Mr Nasty
Do you want your kids growing up thinking this is how life is

[jenniferology]

I have been where you are & I understand your predicament. It's a precarious one indeed. It sounds like your husband may have a personality disorder, i.e bipoloar. Of course, only a licensed physiologist can tell and normally a person of such demeanor won't go see anyone b/c they think they are just fine.

You can't make him treat you better or go seek help. So the solution is going to have to come from you albeit your choices are tough. It seems like you are going to have to decide what you want & how you are going to go about it to obtain it. I suggest you looking up articles on personality disorder and bipolarism. (You may want to delete your cookies on the pc afterward if he uses the same pc) I'm afraid that you are either going to have to confront his dismal attitude towards you and not accept it any longer or you may have to find other suitable living arrangements.

If you could make him do something then your problem could be solved. Since you are the only one you can control you are going to have to make some tough choices. Stay or leave. Take the abuse or demand respect. Either road is tough, I know...but one of those tough roads have freedom at the end,

God bless,
j

[Good Life by Love]

he trust you and opens up when your alone and also for the kids sake

seek couples counseling NO medicine. If they say take medicine go some where else.
Also I see premarital counseling working.Church usually has it for free. You can even attend after marriage. Make sure no medicines.

Arguing is normal but is it good, no, so make sure it is 7 years no arguments. After 7 solid years of perfect marriage then another child if desired.

If things are minor I usually just wouldn't even give it a second thought. If it is major I just fix it the best way and that's it. Maybe this will be a good method for you guys. Always reinforce it with Love
I hope you can be stay at home wife ([no school]events with guys around unless your husband is there 100%) that takes care of all the woman things and he is taking care of all the man things like lifting, fixing working outside and handling all those jerks, and if you do work outside you know what I mean. I hope you can be a home wife so the marriage can be a loving one with peace. He wants a feminine wife not a worker guy. If you make double what he makes he should stay home.
*Talking is good. Find a private place to talk with time to talk. Never teach, just inform if necessary and in a meek manner. Handle the kids and teach them with few words and listen well, pay attention to details. If some parts kids can't be handled then inform the husband.
*Be a good wife and make sure all the cooking and cleaning is done. Stay Fit, Smell Good, Dress well. Make sure to make love when ever either of you want.
*Be meek. Quick to listen, slow to speak. Only tell him things when needed. Never teach him. If you do tell him something make sure it is kindly. Handle the kids, and if you notice you can't for sure then inform him in a kindly way.
*Hugs and kisses are always good any time, instead in front of the guys otherwise the guys might want some too. Make sure to let him know to keep the making love part private.
*Remember your NEVER a push over, you LOVE so you give BUT if your ever taken advantage fix it asap with a calm talk in a private place with time to talk while hugging and ending it with a kiss and maybe love.
*Make sure your spouse can handle things, like if he is not good with money maybe he should handle it. I mean like saving for a 6 month rainy day and then increase that as much as you can as time goes on. Buy a house cash small to start and then bigger when you decide and ready to have a child so the child can stay in one community for their whole school life and a place to come home always during Holidays and for you to plant your plants and watch them grow and to grow old in, make sure to pay cash or go smaller if needed or just wait on the child/bigger home, peace is most important. Retirement, Vacations.
Also make sure to put a small bundle of money as a emergency fund for you

Also I see counseling working. Make sure no medicine
On another note: Try your best. Love like you never love before. This is the best way for love to come and start surrounding your life. May love be around you, through you and is you.
Love and the Good Life will come
Email me if you have another further statements glhww@yahoo.com
P.P.S. More & daily words of encouragements TWITTER my account is = @glhww
P.P.P.S. Majority of my answers are for the majority, there are many variables to consider always
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