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ortonchampion · 10-12-2012, 09:58 AM

I say i want to be a better person but i keep delaying...and then one minute i want to get better then next..i don't want to i like staying to myself...I'm not the social type i have problems with Self esteem and i have adhd and anxiety and bipolar..and i never was really motivated...because when it came to being pro active...i felt like i didn't fit in or Was trying to fit in....and its like when i think about really going to school as in college its like do i want to really take up theater to better my self so i can become a better talker but acting does interest me...it always did i never just took it in high school...like i've done it but had stage fright or felt cheesy...and til this day im interested in it like when i go to plays i just get that feeling like could i do that and i just get inspration to want to do it...but when it comes to actually going to sign up at a community college for it i back out and tell myself ill do it tomarrow...and even when my mom tells me i need to learn a trade and go to a trade school instead of trying to do acting at 23years old...because during high school in the mornings i went to a voltech school and took up carpentry because i loved working with my hands...and at the time i thought it was a volcational school as in like a school for media arts or whatever you wanted to get into and go into that field....after high school...but yeah i took up carpentry because i liked doing it..and you would make good money...and now its like i have no job...and am i wasting my life my still pondering for the last 4years

ortonchampion · 10-12-2012, 10:06 AM

you could start by asking shorter questions...
seriously, i didn't even begin reading all that and i would gladly give you a better answer if it weren't this long

Biggle Piggle · 10-12-2012, 10:06 AM

Get a diary.

Do what you have to do and try for different things.

Thinking about the past won't help.

Stephen · 10-12-2012, 10:06 AM

Well I am sure Mac Donald's will have vacancies when you leave school bet you cant wait

relievedMercenary157 · 10-12-2012, 10:06 AM

By being able to say, with conviction, that you're completely in control of your world and your physical/mental/social state.
Maybe you need something really bad to happen for that desire to improve your state to really ignite. If this is the case, the first step would be to appreciate would you currently have but to also tell yourself that you deserve better.

Instead of feeling stunted by the conditions you have, think about how amazing it would be to overcome them and go against the oddsand do what you know you feel entitled to. You'll feel that you've sold yourself short in the long-run. Just think about all the famous people with bipolar and adhd.
Michael Phelps and an actor in film and series This Is England both have ADHD. Kurt Cobain, Stephen Fry (I think), Sylvia Plath (poet) and others have bipolar.

Decide what you wanna do, be true with yourself in telling yourself when you could be doing more. If you slip up, struggle then thats normal - you're pushing yourself and you're not used to being successful and beating the odds.

Good Luck with what you choose!