What to Do When You Feel So Alone?

[Cheyenne]

My Best Friends all have moved, and I literally have nobody any more. I have tried to make other friends, but get backstabbed or hurt everytime. I'm just listening to music and every song reminds me of a memory with my best friends.. i feel so helpless, empty inside, and alone. what do i do??
i feel so suicidal anymore..

[Grace]

If you feel suicidal, call a hotline or get other help.
Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
Like cutting your nose off if you have a cold and a stuffy nose!

Life does give us lessons. Sometimes the lessons are painful. Perhaps the lesson that you need to learn now is how to be alone and develop yourself.
Find things you like to do--some alone, some with a group
Learn something new from a book or video or by taking a class-- dancing? yoga? a foreign language? singing?
Do things that make you feel like you are making a difference. That can be volunteer work, rolling out a garbage can for an elderly neighbor, collecting food for the homeless, teaching someone to do something.
At one point i helped myself by starting a social and dance/exercise class for older people at a church. I am not that good at dancing or exercising or breing social, but I just read things and played recodings of exercise and dance the group and listened to the people talk.
The best way to meet good people who may become friends is to go places and do things that are positive. Volunteer work, self-help things, etc.

By the way, volunteering to help animals will get you great non-human friends and perhaps a few nice human ones also! Some of my best friends have been cats and dogs.

You can control your own feelings and attitude and also get others to like you or even get rid of those who you don't like! About making friends: There is a great book called "How to Get Anyone to Like You in 90 Seconds or Less" and also similar books and on-line stuff.
It is about how you speak and listen and about body language.
Small example: You need to think logically and be less emotional and remember stuff. Roll your eyes up. You want to be creative and get emotions out. Roll eyes down. I know it sounds crazy, but it works!
Hang in there, dear. Things will get better and you will be a better and smarter person for having gone through your "dark night of the soul."

Look at this way. You are smart and caring. That's good. Sometimes you will be sad. This is part of being smart and caring. However, by using your intelligence and caring for yourself, you survive these learning periods and your life is richer.

Try things-- Journaling. (I personally write things down that bother me. Reread over time to see patterns, change patterns as needed.

When i am really upset about something that cannot be changed, I write about it, tear the paper up, and flush it down the commode! Silly, but it works for me!

Realize that you are your own best friend. There is even a book on that also!
"How to be Your Own Best Friend" Be nice to yourself!

Stay away from negative people and negative media. Those people who reject you. Tell them or at least think "I hope you get better." Mean it. They have a problem. Not you! Poor dears are missing out by not being with you! When you meet someone who might become a new friend, listen a lot. Don't share too much too fast, because not everyone is as nice a person as you are. We are all at different paths on life's journey.

You are God's beloved child. Me too! Am I abosultely certain of that as a fact? No. But believing that works for me! So why not believe it?

At one point in my life I thought I should know everything, be a success at everything, be loved by everyone. It took me years of pain to get over myself. I am just a poor little human. When I send out love to myself and others, I get love reflected back. Every little bit doesn't come back, but enough does!

I am sending out love to you now. It will be ok, dear. I hope you accept this I send and send it back to me.