Does it sound like theres a chance to get back together or is he stringing me along for sex?

[Catherine]

We are both 27 and we dated for 4 months and had a passionate relationship. He went on a vacation with family for Christmas and was gone for 4 days. He came back and things were fine for the first 3 days and then we got into a petty argument caused by me. It was both of our days off and he hadn't called me at all I sent him a message at 7pm saying id make other plans, he then called me and i gave him an attitude. He dumped me that night.
2 week went by with no contact and I messaged him on Facebook. He invited me to have lunch this past tuesday, i went over his house and ate and then we went to the movies, he was cold and seemed detached. He made it clear that we would just be friends and was angry and agitated, he said I wasnt going to guilt him into dating me.That night he made plans with me for the upcoming Saturday. This past Saturday when he got out of work he called me right away and we went to see the Wolf on Wall Street which was a 3 hour movie. He held my hand during the movie, he initiated it. We went back to his place after and he told me I could sleep over, we had sex and it was very affectionate and intimate. I said to him that I didn't plan on sleeping with anyone else, I asked him how he'd feel if I did, he responded "angry and upset". I asked if he was going to sleep with anyone else and he said "you don't have to worry" We fell asleep together and he held me all night.
The next morning he was talking on the phone to his brother and was talking about seeing the movie with me, after he got of the phone he brought me out to breakfast with him and his roommate. He didn't say anything to me for the remainder of Sunday and I initiated contact today at around 3pm seeing if he wanted to hang out tomorrow because its his schedule day off. He was very short with me and said "I dont see why not, I might end up having to go to work, dont know quite yet, however Im down" He then called me 4 hours later and asked me if I wanted to come over and watch game of thrones, I said I couldnt because I was working.
He called me today and said he'd come pick me up at my house, he got me at 11:30am and we chatted and he made us lunch, we had sex, he sat down with me face to face after the fact and said "I want to try friends, I know you need security so I will let you know I am not pursuing any other women and won't sleep with anyone, theres more than a slim chance that we will become a couple again in the future"

[rozen]

First off…I’m a guy so I can tell you that I know how guys think…we waffle everything…Guys always, always ask themselves questions when confronted with a question from a woman. “Why did she ask me that? Women compartmentalize everything…woman take information that they learn about a guy and sort it in little compartments to build a profile on a guy. That’s great…but how do you know that he is into you and wants you around for the long haul? There are only 2 ways (show and tell). 1) You are receiving special attention as described below and 2) He tells you directly. There are countless women out there that would desire to know, with keen interest, when it is time to move on from a guy, especially when there is attraction between the both of you. You enjoy each others company, there are similar interests in the arts, activities, music, etc., however there is something missing…that special touch and attention.

Now, I may get into trouble with the guys for stating this but women are more intuitive than men when it comes to relationships. I was asked, as a “ready to take on the world” young adult, “Do you know when to tell a woman that you love her?” Here’s the answer…”Before someone else does?” Woman want to know, and should I add, want to hear how you feel about them. If I guy does not demonstrate romantic flair (holding hands, kissing, etc.), or at least speak his peace with words of affirmation and endearment, then it may be time to reevaluate the relationship.

The “little” things:

Is it in his kiss?

Does he hold your hand?

Introduce you to his friends and family?

Be willing to meet your friends and family?

Have a relationship with your children?

Is there for you emotionally?

Can talk to him about anything?

I’m sure there are more questions that apply however here are a few critical issues that need to be addressed. Of course, the length of the relationship plays a factor in this evaluation. I would say that if the length of the relationship is six months or more and that feeling of bliss is not being reciprocated, it might be time to address these issues with your guy. Do not let them fester. You might say, “He knows my needs and wants. Why doesn’t he act on them?…but you just answered your own question. He knows what they are! Now, I’m not telling you to throw in the towel…just saying to be careful.

Here is some additional food for thought:

If you never received that special attention from the very beginning chances are you will not get it at this stage either. On the other hand, if he continues to be coy, both verbally and physically, concerning your needs then you may want to keep your options open based on the stability of this relationship.

Do not settle nor linger in a dead-end, unfulfilled relationship where signs of love do not exist. You deserve to know if he can feel that void in your life. Only you know how important these special “little” things are in your spirit and with the right guy in can be unforgettable.