facebook notifications?

[weatherbobeather]

I am becoming slightly angered with my facebook notifications. They are not doing a very good job of making me aware when someone comments on a photo of me, post something on my wall, adds me as a friend, messages me, ect. Or rather, the three buttons by the search bar and logo, are not giving me red numbers.. at all.
Now, I have looked into this multiple times, and everyone's quick fix, is not working for me.
I am continuously being told to "Go to "see all notifications" - click "notifications settings" - check all that you would like to receive notifications from ect. Well, guess what? they are all checked! and nothing is happening!
Not only do i not get a notification on facebook, but i no longer receive an email for things that happen on facebook, like other people who seem to have this problem.
I am quite perturbed with the situation at this point, and am seeking some help.

thank you
EDIT:: this started much before the new facebook update. so that would not be my issue. thank you though

[Pump]

facebook is being plain gay its a glitch from the new profile update