I'm 14 with no friends and social life?

[lalastar]

While it doesn't really surprise me anymore, I might as well get other people's opinions. So, here goes. I am a high school freshman. I moved to my district in seventh grade (I used to live inner-city, I moved to the suburbs). I had friends for awhile I remember. Then, I remember sitting by myself at lunch for a whole trimester (seats were assigned). I was a bit weird, but I was way more outgoing. Eighth grade I had some friends in school and I wasn't as weird, but I did become shy. I think my depression started somewhere in that time period. Now, my "friends" and I go to the local high school. I still talk to them at breakfast,but not much else. I am not blaming it all on them though. I have social anxiety and I get paranoid around people, so I have problem going up to people to make friends. I am really shy at first, but that is not my personality. People admit that I make them feel awkward.

I literally just sit home all day every day. People on facebook talks about hanging out with their friends. People at my school talk about parties and going to the mall. I just sit at home writing and reading. Funny thing is is that I sit by myself at lunch. Well, not by myself, but by people I don't know. They're really nice, but older, and not people who seem interested in being my friend. Not that I blame them. The really funny thing is is that one of my friends sits in the same lunchroom as me, with her friends. I wasn't invited over, even though I remember trying to be friends with one of the other girls earlier in the year. So, I'm not intruding. She doesn't invite me over, so that's cool and all.

Everytime I try to make a friend we just don't connect. I even tried speaking to people at least once a day. I'm trying, but I feel it's too late. People already made out their friends. I also tried clubs, but I could not commit.Too cold to walk two miles and my mom didn't want me to do it. I stopped going to Spanish club in November. Oh and another hilarious thing is that even though one of my friends live in the same apartment complex as me, she rarely invites me to go anywhere. Sometimes, I want to go to the movies, not even a block from my apartment, but I have no one to with. My nephew (he's a year older than me) lives near, but sometimes he is overbearing (he has Adhd, so he can get real hyper) Any suggestions? This isn't all, but I didn't want to weigh you down.

Btw, I also have self-esteem issues that I am really trying to overcome. I try dressing better and taking better care of myself. I used to get called ugly a lot. I still do, but it's more of a cyber thing. When I say I'm paranoid, I mean I think everyone is always looking at me or judging me. But, sometimes people do look at me, for some reason. For example( of many), I was walking to my locker in the morning and these two big groups of people kinda stared at me (mostly boys). I remember asking my friend if I had something on my face. I did kind of change my hairstyle that day? Like literally, people would just sit there and look at me. Not so much in a mean way, just looking. Is that weird?

[asm]

Yes,it is...

[William]

Ahh you sound how I used to be when I was younger...
Hmmm...............................................
I don't know how to answer to this because things become different although I didn't
I stayed the same because I wanted to, now i'm anti social, I don't leave my house and I don't speak to anyone becasue I don't care about it anymore. Although I did feel liek you at one point. Now i'm just happy being alone. I'd suggest getting into anime, but eventually you will become a shut in like me
But don't fret you will find a friend or 2 eventually. It's better to just a few friends, then you will merge into their circle...
Just try to find someone like you. Especially if you get into anime you will find alot of people that are also liek you and you will form alot of nerdy friends...which is cool because the social party shit is annoying...Just chill at your library, you will eventually find someone.

[Claire]

Hi! My suggestion is to get involved. Maybe join a club. Try to find friends in your class right before lunch and then just walk down with them and sit together. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there. And take the boys staring at you as a compliment! They're probably just as shy as you are.