Would you break up with your significant other under these circumstances?

[AyeHye]

1) You learned that your boyfriend or girlfriend had been sending flirty messages to someone else over Facebook.

2) Your boyfriend or girlfriend logged onto your Facebook and read through all your messages to see if any of them were flirty.

Would you break up with them under either, both, or neither of those circumstances?
@ 'lyssa - If you don't have a Facebook, substitute your text messages, handwritten correspondence, whatever.

[Jess]

No. I don't care if he flirts and I don't care if he reads my Facebook messages. I'm fairly sure he knows all my passwords. I don't keep them a secret.

[?]

If it was a new relationship, I’d just end it right away and be done with it.

If I were emotionally invested in the relationship I would see it as a serious problem and there would be a come to Jesus talk. I’d be very suspicious but I may not end the relationship, at least right away.

--Jesse Pinkman

[?]

1) no, but I would want to know what's going on and WHY it's going on and if he wants to be with me

2) well, I don't have facebook so n/a

edit: well no, I wouldn't break up (notright away) but I would want to know why he doesn't trust me and feels the need to violate my privacy.
either he is insecure and has control issues or has been burned by someone in the past. I wouldn't want to be with someone who feels the need to snoop through my personal stuff.

[Seth]

The first reason not so much but second reason yes. But dont just go bye what i say. We all got different opinion.

[Matt]

1. naaa
2. no but i'd be pretty pi$$ed if she deliberately went through my phone.. but i leave it at hers anyways.

[Sunshine]

1 would be a deal breaker
2 would upset me, but I wouldn't necessarily break it off over that. Unless this was just in addition to him being suspicious and jealous or controlling already.

[Mabe]

1.) I wouldn't be feeling the love at that point, that's for sure. It would definitely break my trust, and my heart at the same time. I can't see any other way around the fact that I would break up with that person at that point. I couldn't live like that.

2.) A sneaky person that doesn't feel comfortable enough to trust me and does something like this won't stop at that to find out what they want. This person is obsessed. Obsessed is someone that won't confront you with what they want to know. They go after it like a lone-shark..taking it. If that person wants to know something then ask. If you can't ask then I think you are up to something myself. This could lead to revenge, and you not even know what it is about. Bad things just start happening to you, cause by the other person. Still acting as though everything is honky-dorey, taking pleasure in your suffering, but not letting on. I would lose trust with a person like that and not like them, let alone love them, but wonder what else that person is going to do. I would break up with them and break their heart, and not mine own.

In both circumstances the relationship is broken.

[Mabel B]

No, but there would be a very heated argument!

[Willow]

I like this question. There is a subtle hint at a double standard we put on ourselves here. How would I find out they were sending flirty messages/texts short of invading their privacy. Unless the person they were messaging had the nads to tell me about it. Therefore, I can't get mad about them invading my privacy as question 2 suggests, if I was willing to try and find their messages/texts as in scenario 1. I'd be a bit of a hypocrite if I did. It doesn't really even matter to me the depth of the relationship. If it isn't seriou, I'm not really going to care if they flirt and they certainly shouldn't care if I do. In a serious relationship, both would require a serious discussion about a restablishment of trust and boundaries.