Maybe he's just not that into me... should I give up?

[Annabelle]

His actions don't say he likes you. His actions say, "I'm cool with letting you make me feel good about myself without giving you more than the bare minimum in return." Sure, he's occasionally choosing you over his friends - but that's normal. Sometimes you'd rather hang out with Person A instead of Group/Person B, especially when Person A is being all nice to you and having PG13 sleep overs (that sounded mean, and I didn't mean for it to -- I just didn't want to imply you're doing X rated stuff, though frankly I wouldn't udge you if you were).

Bottom line? He says and does the things that'll keep you around and make you feel kind of important, but he's also going on Twitter and saying things that he -- if he knows you like him -- *has to know* will wound you, even in a small way. If, while talking to you, he's still lamenting not having enough of a certain type of girl -- he either thinks you're not what he's looking for, or he's looking for more than one of you. Either is disrespectful.

If you read the book "he's just not that into you," you'll find exactly this scenario in one of the chapters, with the end result being "he's just not that into you."

Which is fine, really, because by virtue of not being into you, he's given you all you need to know to not be into him. I mean, when you picture yourself dating someone - he likes you back, right? And this guy doesn't, or at least not enough. Find another guy.

Fair warning: when you do, the guy you're with now will either start being extra super nice and extra super willing to commit, or he'll be snarky and jealous. Or anything else that might make you think he's into you. Whenever he does, I want you to notice(and definitely take into account) how easy it suddenly is for him to show you he cares, and and I want you to think about all the time and energy you've spent thinking about him, all the time you've spent telling him how you feel and who you are (even things apart from liking him). Then realize that he didn't do those easy things because he *chose* not to -- you showed him who you are, and he said "not worth it."

Which isn't exactly Grade A Boyfriend Behavior. It's not even Grade A Friend Behavior. I don't claim to know who you are, but I know you shouldn't think so little of yourself that you're willing to sit around eating scraps when it's absolutely possible to have something fresh, better tasting, and better for you. This guy isn't into you? No big deal. He's just one color of paint. You've got a whole spectrum of other colors around you all the time. Especially in college.