Senior citizens: Is it true relationships with the opposite sex don't work out in your 20's? If so why?

[Ann]

I fell in love at 18 and wanted to marry a boy in my senior class. I hadn't dated much, because my parents didn't allow it. The boy and I had common ideals and interests. My father was insanely jealous and refused to allow me to ever see him again. He even tried to get the boy's father fired from his job and wanted the family out of town. He picked another boy he claimed was a "better fit" for me and strongly encourage me to marry him. It turned out to be a move of pure revenge on my father's part. The boy's father was an alcoholic (I had never been exposed to that lifestyle and was very naive), and the boy turned out to be a "dry alcoholic" with all of the accompanying behaviors. He was very abusive and controlling. This was in the early 1950's, when one didn't go against parents. Because in our church, divorce was looked upon as a mortal sin, I stayed with it for 33 long years. He was also abusive to our children. Finally, in my 50's, I just walked out one day. Amazingly, our two boys were convinced that he was the victim and I had abandoned him. They didn't speak to me for years. Their stance has softened somewhat, but 22 years (and two additional wives later), my ex is still trying to reap revenge. If I had known in my 20's what I now know about life, I would have just left home, not married, and made it on my own. I would rather have starved to death than to go through that again. I couldn't even defend the children, because he controlled the bank account, the telephone, and the mailbox. I didn't know about CPS, and there were people at church whom I thought were friends until I went through a divorce. They still turn their backs or go across the street when they see me.