girlfriend looked at Facebook messages. HELP?

[Lamont]

Damn. That other answerer (James) is cold. Look, I understand where you are coming from bro. And this might be something you do in other relationships as well but hopefully, you'll come to control it one day. It is an insecurity thing. You like the attention from other females and the way they react to it. The more into you they become, the better you feel, BUT you would NEVER take that final step into actually physically cheating. It's more like to satisfy your want for female attention, right?

I get it man, so don't worry, you're not the only one who does this. The problem is that with doing that kind of stuff, you greatly risk hurting your gf. This isn't something that she will understand (and the younger you are, the less understanding she'll be). It's kind of like trying to explain to a girlfriend that hates porn, why you watch it. Damn near impossible for her to see the urges that you have, which has NOTHING to do with her or the relationship.

The best thing you can do is apologize, tell her you love her, and that you'll stop. Explain your insecurity to her and let her know that it has nothing to do with her.

If it helps, I did the same thing bro. I grew up believing I was ugly to everyone. I had a gf who treated me like crap, we broke up, and I found something better. Yet, I kept speaking to other girls because it just made me feel better about myself...more confident on those days where I felt very ugly. But eventually, my gf found out, I explained to her, and luckily she understood. I promised not to do it again and I never did because any time I thought about doing it, I remembered how hurt she was, and she just wasn't worth losing.

If your gf can't forgive you for this, you may have to just cut your losses, because she has every right to be upset. Learn to be happy with yourself and if those urges come up while you have a gf, remember to put her feelings in front of yours.