Should I leave my 1 & only friend?

[IWillKillYou]

I'm 19 years old, female, and I only have one friend and she's my best friend....she's 44. She knew me in elementary school and she just now found me after 10 years.
She doesn't have a normal job, she takes care of handicapped men in her home 24-7 but she does have someone who helps take care of them so she does have like 4 days off from work. She's married and has no kids (of which she says I'm the closest thing to her daughter).
She is busy, I know, but it seems like she never gives to me. I don't have any family or other friends because I was abused all my life. She knows how much I need a mother figure but she refuses! She won't buy me a helmet (of which I just got a concussion because I can't afford one) because she doesn't want to b a mother, but I just want a helmet so I don't break my head! We have a Facebook group together, we started it so we could post stuff privately, it's been a month and everything on the page I've written; it's like I'm the only one in the group! And I've manipulated/lied/controlled her in the past because that's all I knew, but I've fixed it, I don't do these things anymore! and she is still suspicious and accuses me. What kind of person does she think I am? She wonders if I'll ruin her job, marriage and if I want t set her up to sue her. I love her so much! It hurts me that I ever hurt her! She is everything to me but....she's my only friend/family, so of course I'll do anything to keep her in my life. I know I'm afraid to loose her because I love her and she is amazing but then, I have NO ONE else. If I had other people in my life, I know I would have probably left her or at least have seen less of her. I just feel she doesn't care about me, she doesn't take risks for me, she doesn't give as much as I do....she constantly disappoints me and makes me cry. I don't know f I should leave her...I know she'll never leave me because she loves me unconditionally and has a right to leave

[BIG DADDY COOL]

I say yes, find friends your own age. You don't sound happy right now.