My husband won't let me go to conventions, what do I do?

[Summa Rudis]

To be honest I only read your initial question, last paragraph and scanned a bit of the rest.
Yes, he's insecure. Doesn't matter how far away you are, it's simply that you will not be under his control and direct observation. He doesn't want you to have any interests outside of him, and that YOU are supposed to adapt to HIS likes and interests.

Honest opinion? Sit him down and ask him if he's your friend. If he says yes then say that you are going to the convention, he's welcome to come along and if he decides not to he needs to shut his pie hole and give you some peace.

A strong marriage is built on friendship and trust.

[Anne M]

Since you asked for advice, I'm going to lay it on you: Quit going to the conventions. Speaking as a single person (me), there is absolutely no percentage in alienating a decent husband in favor of hanging out with friends. Ask yourself, if you had a choice, the friends or the husband, which would you choose? If the answer is the husband, then you need to let this particular aspect of your social life go.

We could argue all day about whether conventions in and of themselves are bad, or whether a married person should go to a convention without her spouse. But that's not really the point, is it? The point is that this is something that bothers him, and it bothers him a lot, and you need to show some respect for this. If he were doing something that bothered you this much (going out drinking or gambling with friends, etc.), it would be very important to you that he listen to your feelings and care about them. So you should do the same.

Don't forget that men and women think about things like this differently. When you say "convention" and "wearing costumes," yeah, he might be picturing one of those kinky sex conventions, or a situation where everyone is parading around half-dressed and partying without their spouses. That may not be what it is for you.....but what about the other men at the convention? Your husband is thinking about what's going on in THEIR heads, not what's going on in yours. Guys know what others guys want, and you can be sure that there will be guys at the convention who think "My LIttle Pony" is the perfect cover for getting a little bit of what they're all looking for.

But even that isn't the point. The point is that if you want your marriage to work, you need a bend a little bit. It doesn't mean you have to give up everything. It just means you have to show him that you're willing to take his feelings as seriously as you take your own. Sit down with him and tell him why these activities are important to you, and talk together about a compromise---something you can do that allows you to have fun without causing him this kind of worry. If you show him that you're taking him seriously, HE may then be willing to bend a little and let you go to the conventions that don't seem as threatening to him.

But even if he doesn't...........my personal feeling is, it's time to grow up. Going to oddball conventions, "hanging out" with people and getting your picture taken is kids' stuff. It's the kind of thing single people do, for the purpose of meeting other single people. For a married woman to do this a lot, by herself, definitely does smack of boredom in your marriage and looking for something else. I'm sorry, but if your husband thinks that, and I think it, other people are going to think it too (including the guys at the convention).

So again, my advice........drop the conventions. If you're willing to go to these types of events, in costume, then you are a free spirit and a resourceful person, and you can definitely find other ways to enjoy your friends while stlil keeping your marriage.