Did my boyfriend break up with me because he's confused about his sexuality?

[Manderzz]

A little over a month ago, my boyfriend broke up with me out of the blue. He said he doesn't have that "spark" like he used to and apparently he had been feeling like this for a few weeks before and he was trying to figure out why. It's like he really wanted to be with me but he couldn't because he wasn't feeling it. The feeling wasn't mutual between us. He wasn't in to me anymore and didn't love me. Of course, I thought I did something but I haven't. He also works full time and goes to school full time and is very stressed out. This is his first real relationship. He messaged me on facebook 3 weeks after and said he's sorry things didn't work out and could we still be friends. I said we could give it a try. Two weeks later, he hadn't contacted me at all. So I messaged him and said I thought we were friends but yet you're totally ignoring me. He admitted to doing it and said that just because we're friends doesn't mean we have to text all the time and that sometimes he doesn't text his guy friends in over a month. Basically he sounded really confused and was saying things like I'm not an evil or cruel person, and we can't see each other and go out as friends until after the holidays because he's busy, which is bs. He went out the other night with his guy friends. He had been going out with them like every weekend out drinking. But it was only guy friends. I remember specifically he hated gays. When we were dating he would joke with his guy friends about being gay and texting them gay messages, jokingly. And he never really wanted to get intimate, maybe once in a while. He's 21 and I know just about every guy that age wants only 1 thing and basically he only liked getting boners. That's what he liked he told me, and I always gave him one when we kissed. I just want to know if anyone thinks he's confused about being gay or not. He couldn't really explain to me why he didn't want to be with me and he just seems really confused whenever I message him on fb. Now, he doesn't dress gay, talk gay, walk gay, or act gay. It's not obvious if he is but it's almost as like he's hiding and doesn't want to accept the fact that he's gay. My aunt told me that she's 95% sure that he's gay, and she's been around the block a few times. I just want to know if he could possibly be gay? I know the only real way to find out is to ask him but I know he would deny it.

[Vamp]

You are searching for reasons why this relationship came to an end.

However, the guy told you why the relationship had ended - the spark had gone.

Now that's a very common reason for relationships to come to an end. Many relationships do have a natural life and just putter-out towards the end. Regrettably people don't always reach that point together. But there isn't anything you can do about it - it just happens.

Relationships are, in general, emotional rather than logical and you can drive yourself mad trying to search for "logic" in emotion. Equally because it is emotion, it can be hard to describe. He knows that things are over - he can feel it. What he can't do is find the right words to explain it. You can nag at him all you like but you aren't going to get a "logical" explanation and the relationship will still be over anyway.

The "gay" issue is really irrelevant. There's no real evidence one-way-or-another and it would not matter if there was.

The other thing is that, when relationships break up, people need time to get over them. You aren't giving him any space. You want him to text and you want him to continue going out with you. He doesn't want to do either of these things.

Just accept that the relationship is over and that you both need time to come to terms with the end of the relationship.

Give yourself the time and give him the space.