Listen to me vent and perhaps give me some advice?

[Kayla]

My husband and I have been married for a little over a year. I love him dearly, and would do anything for him. However, we have one great problem: his mother. I know it's typical for mother-in-laws and daughter-in-laws to have problems now and then, but, unfortunately, we have many. The first time we ever had a confrontation was when her husband backed into my car and left a huge hole in my bumper. I left to visit my parents, and when i got there, my father pointed out the hole, which, before then, i didn't even know existed. I cried, and called my husband to ask him if he knew what happened. He didn't, and not two seconds later i got a call from his stepdad telling me he had backed into it. Well, this would have been fine since he agreed to pay for it, (1500 dollars to replace the bumper and whatnot), but his mother decided it would be best for MY parents to pay out of pocket for the fix, while they pay them back 100 dollars a month or whenever they could afford it. This set me off. I felt like it was unfair that my parents had to take the responsibility of paying for the accident, but my parents and I pitched in to pay up front so that problems would be avoided. Well, eventually things came around and got a little better. However, about three months ago, my husband and I had a fight about his mother and sister, who claimed that they never got to see him and more or less blamed me for the situation while, on the contrary, he was the one who didn't want to go see them every weekend because of his job. His sister put rude things about me on facebook, which is embarassing for me. So, not to make it sound like i've never done anything wrong, but the whole situation was his mother and sister's fault. His mother called me, yelled at me, and I, naturally, yelled back. Well, this made my husband mad at me. He yelled at me and told me that we were getting a divorce if i didn't apologize. So i had to apologize for the whole thing that wasn't my fault. For my husband, I made up with his mother and sister. Now, things are getting hard again because his mother wants to try to tell me how i should cook, how i should take care of him, etc., and i have to just bite my tongue to make things right with my husband. Sorry for the novel, but i feel like venting lol. Does anybody have any advice or stories they may want to share? Any feedback would be much appreciated.
As a side note, we do NOT always sit around and yell at each other. I yelled because i was being yelled at and quite frankly I'm sure most people would not take it either.

[daljack -a girl]

I just browsed through this......my advice.....you should all stop yelling and learn to listen to each other.

[Iz]

I wish I had a story for you, but I don't. Sorry! Here's my advice...
Now, for one, you can't expect your husband to take your side on everything. I mean, it's his mom. But it is absolutely ridiculous that he would threaten a divorce! That is NOT ok!
Two, the Facebook thing is not ok, either. Print that stuff off and keep it in a file. That could be useful.
Three, you need to keep your chin up. If you cook horribly, (which, of course, you don't!) that is none! of your mother-in-law's business. Don't let her tell you what to do. Just say, "Now, (insert her name here), I get that. I will try to give that a go in the future, but for now, this is what I'm doing."
Four, sit down with your husband and his mother and talk things out. I think she just misses her little boy.
Good luck! I hope you work things out!

[Anubis]

He clearly takes his families side on almost all issues. The best thing you can do is to stay away and out of any of his family business. Be firm and clear with him that since he will not defend you, you do not want to be involved with any of it. You two need clear open and honest communication in this matter. If he doesn't like that you have to take care of yourself, then perhaps you are best off without him.
The social media thing, you are best to remove all those people from seeing anything with you. Let them throw their tantrums, just don't look at it.
Take care of yourself and your sanity first and foremost. Be open and honest with your husband with what you need and want, and make sure he understands that he married you and if he won't be there for you, this will never work.
Other peoples families are hard to handle. Ones own family can be tough enough. Just don't get in the middle of there things. I would honestly recommend just staying away from them all together.
You are grown woman. Stand up for yourself if he won't help you. Don't let yourself be constantly berated.
A marriage is tough enough without all the extra problems. If you feel counseling is in order, there is nothing wrong with that too.
We all need to vent sometimes, so that is understandable. Just don't let him blame you for all of it.