What's wrong with me?

[Aphotic Sun]

Well, I'm a 16 year old male, I have almost no friends, and I'm very lonely - and the ones I get I lose soon after. I have a hard time in social situations about30% of the time out of fear, I have no why, and I have almost no social skills, I just do weird attention grabbing things, usually sexual, sometimes by touching people in an inappropriate manner, but never if an adult is near - or someone that I knows my family. Of course I can't make friends that way, but I can't stop doing stuff like that, and If I don't get very much attention I get very depressed, to the point of suicidal thoughts. But in order to get friends, I say tell people about my problems (Like I'm doing now), most of the time its truthful what I say to make people feel bad for me, but sometimes I say things like that I was raped, or that I have schizophrenia, which are very far from the truth, but it's like a make a new lie everyday so I can get attention, usually negative attention -people hate me for this, and then say things like "why can't you be normal", etc. I'm also homosexual, and most people at my school are homophobic, so I can't make friends because of that also. I was attacked last year because of that...

I have a lot of mood swings, one moment I'll be super happy and hyper, and the next I'll be very depressed. Sometimes they are very frequent, and sometimes not at all. Sometimes they're triggered, sometimes not and just happen for explainable reasons. It seems like the smallest things can make me depressed, and the smallest things can make me really excited. I know I was very emotional as a child, but idk how emotional I was - or how the pattern on my emotions. When I get depressed - I get really depressed. I've attempted suicide twice - failing obviously. I have a lot of self harming tendencies - I started cutting in 6th grade (I'm in 10th now), it was worse last April, where I would cut myself 8 times a day for about two weeks. And I really just want to someone to love me, but I know that will never happen and that I will never amount to anything. Also people make fun of the music I listen to, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1SlcO0F… which seems minor, but it's really important to me, and I write music, play guitar, and sing - but I think I'm really untalented

I'm a very insecure person, I think I'm very unattractive, ( I guess you be the judge of that) https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=…
I hate my body, my face, my weight, everything, I want to lose about 10 pounds, right now I'm at 128 pounds and I'm 5'5. This has gotten to the point of bulimia... and a destroyed self-esteem, terrible grades, depression, and so on.

My parents are kind of abusing, all they do is yell/scream at me about how worthless I am, how I'm just a failure, how I'm not like my older brother (he's 21) or my sister (she's 11), they're really good at sports and I'm just pretty much bad at everything. It's usaully my mom who does this, but my dad has been acting like that too lately, and my mom has been acting strange lately, either super warm and motherly, or the total opposite - she is 5 months pregnant anyway

Also, I get usually about five-three, sometimes zero hours of sleep,
and I get very paranoid about everything, like if I see two people talking to themselves I think they're talking about me, in a negative way, and sometimes I feel like someone (who are neo manson family people) is trying to murder me, and my aunt has Bipolar disorder. If any of those are important
since those links failed to work

https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=...933&type=3
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1SlcO0Fikc

[Brad]

I think you are severely depressed and could benefit from seeing your doctor.