Should i go back to my wife?

[Paul]

Brother, I'm sorry this happened to you. It happened to me as well many years ago. Let me encourage you.. people are weak sometimes. Even though someone cheats it doesn't mean their love for the one they are with is diminished, it just means they have elevated someone (unjustly) over the vows they took. Most often times they realize what a horrible mistake they made and get on with life as best they can.. always carrying a ton of guilt.

The guilt thats carried is often times more than a person can bear.. you stated she had a mini-stroke.. I believe it.

My advice brother is to go to marriage counseling. Make the day you start the FIRST day of the rest of BOTH your lives. You saw something in each other when you married.. it hasnt gone away.. just clouded a little bit. WORK and FIGHT for your marriage like you fight for and WITH your brothers with that M4. Dont retreat or fall back.. go forward and take out the enemy... which is the "distrust" that has invaded your marriage.

Trust that the Lord knows your pain.. And hers too. May He Bless you and help you.

[Patrick]

No

[Carol]

Listen if you have thoughts of suicide over "love" you need to start a journal (hand written audio or computer)l...start with 2 blank pages the first pg compliments you've received the 2nd things you like about yourself then start with anything everything..it might take 6 months till you get any benefit...think of it as free therapy. Ask research Q to explore who you are you will find your self esteem growing and you ,might see what it is your lacking and in finding that you might find your way to someone who is worthy of you not some cheating loser

[Kirsten]

I'm going through a situation where my husband cheated on me with someone at his work!
Same as you I got lied to and that hurt me more than anything now we are talking and trying to sort things and it's making me ill! I have no trust for him and even the thought of going to bed with him again makes me feel sick you should stay away from her no one should ever cheat married or not it's wrong and to lie it's worse! I hope your okay it is a hard time for you but you will get through it end or the day it's them who suffer more than us :-) x

[JC]

Warren I'm so sorry for what you are going through. It definitely isn't an easy thing to experience. To many, it is so easy to conclude that a marriage has to end even when a couple isn't even experiencing a serious matter. That shows a lack of respect to the marriage arrangement made by the originator of marriage, God (Matthew 19:4-6). However, Warren, in your case, the Bible gives victims of infidelity the option to divorce as stated in Matthew 19:9. Therefore, the decision to stay with the one at fault or not only rests with you and no one else. No one else should impose their views on you. This is definitely a hard decision, but definitely take your time to think about the decision you want to make and discuss your thoughts with your wife. No matter the decision, remember that "each one will carry his own load" or responsibility (Galations 6:9). So in other words, whatever e decision, you will have to live with it. I have a couple of bible based articles (the links below) that may help you in whatever your decision may be. These practical articles have helped many families around the world. Feel free to read them and take the time to think about your situation. Remember, whether you stay or leave her, it will take time to heal. I really hope the best for you.
http://www.jw.org/en/bible-teachings/fam...s-parents/

http://www.jw.org/en/publications/magazi...n-marriage

(Four things you should know about divorce)
http://m.wol.jw.org/en/wol/d/r1/lp-e/102...orce&p=par

[ranger_co_1_75]

Answer this question; "Will you be better off without her or with her"? Compile two list. One of all the good things about the relationship, and another list of the bad things. Actually writing things down will help you get rid of the emotions that cloud your thinking. You will have just the facts in front of you and that will help you make up your mind.
Put down things like Lies, Cheats, Tries to control you by threatening suicide on one list. Put the Good things on the other list. You now have your relationship on paper. Would you be better off without her or with her?

[Moretime]

Hi Warren as much as it sounds such a mess it can all be sorted if you stay strong and remember that none of this was your doing. Also as much as feel for your wife having had a mini-stroke an all she has no-one else to blame but herself. Why, because conveniently they both had orchestrated this story that should they get caught out they both would admit only to a kiss and held hands. So busted yet again and she cries wolf that she's going to commit suicide and also destroys stuff in an attempt to childishly let you know she's serious. As much as I wouldn't wish anyone to have a stroke yet you blame yourself for what happened to her. It's this sort of reaction that these type of people expect which is why people like you Warren end up taking care of such manipulative users. Did she or even he for that matter stop to think about what all this could do to you and your career had you (excuse my terminology) malfunctioned or broken-down while trying to do your duty. Warren the state that she finds herself in was her own doing and yet you still feel sort of compelled to have to justify what action you should take. I leave you with this. Electronic devices were their undoing, and you were out the country, so will never really know what they got up to while you were gone and will always be left wondering. I think it's time you started to think about no1 and I wish you the very best and hope that you make the right choice for you.

[C]

you have to ask yourself CAN YOU TRUST HER AGAIN. Nobody can answer that but you. If you think you want to try again then i would suggest counseling to help you guys. Goodluck!